Chapter 1: “Only Those Prepared to Be Seen in Cosplay May Look Upon Cosplay”

 

“If you don’t want it getting out, Ryouta-senpai, you should become my little puppy.”

“Wha—”

On the way home after supporting Rui.

The me who should’ve been heading back along the route is instead being threatened by a mysterious underclassman—Himesaki Nozomi—and on top of that, was hit with a mysterious demand.

Looks like she got her hands on some information somewhere—one that leans heavily toward “false” as far as the truth goes—that Rui and I are in a pretty intimate relationship, and she’s using it as ammunition to threaten me.

There’s still a chance it’s just a bluff, so I guess I’ll watch her reactions and drop that line on her.

“So? What’ll you do? Become my little puppy like a good boy?”

“If I… offer myself up and become your so-called puppy… you’ll keep quiet?”

“Yes, I promise♡ It’s a give-and-take between your pride, Ryouta-senpai, and my information. Now then, Ryouta-senpai, become my little puppy—”

 

“I refuse.”

 

I declare it with a smug, deeply chiseled doya-face.

[Note: A “doya-face” (ドヤ顔 / doyagao) is Japanese slang for a smug, boastful, or triumphant expression — the kind of face you make when you’re showing off or proud of yourself.]

I lured her into this just so I could say it.

“W-why!? You’re the one who’s backed into a corner here!”

“I’m not in a shady relationship with Rui. I don’t know where you picked up that ‘info,‘ but if you don’t have proof, it’s just a rumor.”

“If it’s proof… no, unfortunately, I was out all day today, so my battery died.”

“Battery died?”

“There’ll come a time when we talk again. And when that happens, you’ll become my little puppy, okay? Ryouta-senpai♡”

Leaving that behind, Himesaki briskly ran off down the road dyed in a madder red, her delicate red hair fluttering in the south wind.

“What in the world was that underclassman…”

If she really had proof and all she wanted was to spread some nasty rumor about Rui, there’d be no point in threatening me in the first place.

So then… what exactly is her goal…?

As I stopped on the roadside, thinking it over, my phone started ringing.

The caller was Yuria.

We literally just parted ways back at school—did she miss me already, or something?

Yeah, no. Let’s set that painfully self-conscious joke aside.

“Hello? What’s up, Yuria?”

‘Ah, Ryouta? You okay right now?’

“Yeah. Something happen?”

‘So, um—tomorrow, there’s something I wanna show you, Ryouta.’

“Show me? Don’t tell me it’s something that starts with ‘o’ and ends with ‘i’?”

‘Ugh. I think this is the first time I’ve ever wanted to punch someone through a phone.’

Yuria sounded like she was about to blow a gasket, so I decided to stop joking around any further.

‘You remember the maid outfit I was supposed to wear at last year’s culture festival? You said you wanted to see it, right?’

“Wait—seriously!? It’s okay, Yuria!?”

That infamous maid outfit from last year’s culture festival—the one where only Yuria was so thick it turned into an incident.

I feel like she’d said she’d show me someday, but I never thought that day would actually come.

‘Well, there’s also a bunch of other stuff I want you to wear—no, I mean, see… anyway, tomorrow’s a cosplay photo shoot. You free?’

A cosplay photo shoot with just Yuria and me, alone!?

Bringing it up herself—Yuria’s pretty damn pervy too, huh.

“Of course I’m free! Tomorrow the only thing on my schedule is my mom’s sepak takraw national tournament, so I’m basically wide open.”

‘That’s, like, a super important errand. You’re going to cheer her on, right?’

“I used to go a lot, but lately she says it’s embarrassing, so don’t come.”

‘Is she a teenager!?’

She is… a forty year old teenager.

‘Anyway, meet at my place tomorrow morning. I’ll send you my address later.’

“‘Kay. See you tomorrow.”

The call with Yuria ended.

“Damn… I’m getting hyped.”

With the cosplay shoot talk with Yuria, I’d completely forgotten about Himesaki, who’d been there just a moment ago.

 

☆☆

 

—The next day.

We were meeting at 9 a.m., so I headed to Yuria’s house, rubbing sleep from my eyes, so I could get a good, long look at that “so-ero, it caused an incident” maid outfit from last year’s culture festival.

Looking back, this summer vacation, I’ve basically been at the beck and call of the beauty trio almost every day.

But today, by pure coincidence, Airi’s at work, and Rui’s still in Kanto for Inter-High.

In other words, even if I’m alone with Yuria this time, no one will find out, and no one will complain—so goes the logic.

When I spent a night together with Airi, thanks to Airi leaking information, that photo of me and Airi on the futon, sweating (battle ●●m!), ended up in Rui’s hands… but with Yuria, I don’t have to worry about that. Airi’s at work, Rui’s in Kanto, and that means there’s no chance of us running into each other in the first place.

“When the cat’s away…” Yeah. This is exactly that.

Still, for an introverted guy like me to be invited over to a girl’s house… that’s a first in my life.

Back in middle school, I used to hang out in my room with Tanaka almost every day, but… that only felt easy because it was my room—my “home turf.” The moment you step into a girl’s room, you’re completely on enemy ground.

In an unfamiliar environment, there’s a very real possibility I’ll stumble across some thing from the opposite sex (like that mysterious box in the bathroom), you know.

Well, Yuria’s already found the “rubbers” in my room before… so even if there’s something in Yuria’s room, we’d be even.

Before heading to Yuria’s place, I bought an assorted pack of baked sweets from the local convenience store as a small gift, then checked the address she’d sent me on LINE.

“Okay, so from here, to get to Yuria’s house… huh?”

Wait—hold up. Now that I’m actually looking… isn’t her address in a high-class residential area?

 

☆☆

 

The house I arrived at—Yuria’s—was enclosed by tall, classic wrought-iron fencing. Beside the white outer walls and black roof stood a long, refined Western-style mansion… and it even had a stylish garage attached.

On the lawn within the grounds, glimpsed through the gaps in the fence, a large dog was sprawled out, taking a nap.

“I-is this really the same residential neighborhood in Natsuhama City…?”

“Ryouta—took you long enough. Mornin’.”

Right as I stood at the gate, overwhelmed by just how huge and fancy the place was, Yuria—who’d been watering the lawn—shut off the water and walked over.

“O-oh… morning.”

She showed up in denim hot pants and a white crop top… a filthy, pervy gyaru look straight out of a Western movie.

The distressing in the denim looked like it was about to tear even more, thanks to those absolutely ridiculous thighs.

If they tear too far and the shorts become unusable… I’ll buy them off her for whatever price she asks.

“Hm? What’s up?”

“Ah—no, it’s nothing. Anyway, this… sorry it’s something so trivial, but if you’d like, please share it with your family.”

“Huh, for real? You seriously went out of your way—thanks, Ryouta.”

Now that I’ve seen Yuria’s house, saying “It’s nothing, really” feels like I truly did bring “nothing” in the most literal sense.

Maybe I should’ve bought some brand-name cake or something… but nothing was open yet.

“You’re such a weirdo pervert usually, but you’re actually solid about stuff like this, y’know? Even though you’re a pervert.”

“Quit calling me a pervert over and over.”

“But you are a pervert. I mean, you’ve been staring at my hot pants nonstop.”

Yuria lifted my chin with one hand and forcibly tilted my gaze upward.

Yeah, I can’t deny I’d been holding a conversation with Yuria’s huge thighs…

“Seriously though, it’s kinda messed up that my dog’s smarter than you.”

“That big dog’s smart?”

“Yeah, pretty much… oh, right. If you’ll behave better than that dog, I could ‘keep’ you, y’know?”

“For real!? You would!?”

“Ugh… you being into it is honestly gross.”

Laughing like she was a little put off, Yuria grabbed my hand.

“More importantly, aren’t you coming inside? It’s hot as hell.”

“O-oh… but wait a sec. I haven’t even prepared to greet your parents—”

“It’s not like you came to announce our engagement… besides, my parents are overseas right now.”

“Overseas?”

“Yup. My parents’ hobby is traveling abroad. I wanted to hang out with everyone, so I stayed home this year.”

“I-I see…”

Traveling abroad as a hobby… yeah, rich people really are something else.

Way different from my mom—who plays sepak takraw eight days a week—and my dad, who’s only interested in saving money.

Overseas travel is so far outside my family’s world it’s not even funny.

“Well, it’s just me at home, so relax, okay?”

In other words… it’s just me and Yuria alone right now.

The moment I think of that, my body tensed up even harder (in my lower half, too).

Alone together, and I get to photograph Yuria’s maid cosplay from top to bottom… it’s way too lewd.

“Alright then, pardon the intrusion—whoa… huge.”

That is not a comment about Yuria’s thighs, of course.

Yuria’s entryway was so spacious it didn’t even feel like a Japanese house. Pure-white walls, a marble floor that was all slick and shiny… and more than anything else, the first thing my eyes locked onto was this weirdly massive full-body plaster statue sitting right by the entrance.

A naked man was standing there, leaning against some mysterious object, and of course my gaze kept getting dragged to the impressive p●n●s in the lower region.

This is the first house I’ve ever entered where there’s a p●n●s right by the door…

“I-is this… like, some famous statue or something?”

“No clue. My dad buys stuff like this every time he goes overseas. I think it’s just huge for no reason and probably not even that valuable, but—wanna try breaking it as a test?”

“Like hell we can! There’s no way I could pay back whatever that’d cost, and if it came to that, I’d have to do a naked dogeza.”

“Ahaha, that’d be hilarious. I kinda wanna see you do a naked dogeza, honestly.”

She’s enjoying this way too much…

“I mean? The plaster statue’s probably a no-go, but if you did break something in my house, it’d all get solved if you ‘came to this house,’ y’know?”

“M-me, to Yuria’s house…? You mean I’d be forgiven if I moved into that doghouse too?”

“What kind of brain do you have that you get there? You’re way too hardcore of an M… anyway, the idiot that is Ryouta can live in the doghouse.”

With an exasperated snort, Yuria tossed that out and walked on ahead.

Carefully so I wouldn’t break anything, I followed after her, awkward and on high alert.

“But your dad’s got good taste, Yuria. If you had to look at a p●n●s so huge even a guy would be shocked every single day, it feels like yours could get bigger too.”

A naked plaster statue in the entrance… her dad’s got a pretty wild hobby, but then again, Yuria also wanted figurines from that late-night anime where cute girls are constantly getting naked, 《Chichi-kyun》, so… yeah, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

“Like, is that thing actually big? I’ve never seen a real pe…s or anything, so I wouldn’t know.”

“Wait, you’ve never seen a p●n●s!? I figured you of all people had at least seen one.”

“Oh my god! You and your p●n●s, p●n●s—shut up! I haven’t seen one! And I told you before, I’m still a v●rgin!”

Ah… right. She did say that.

High School’s No. 1 gyaru, Yuria—she looks like she’d be playing around nonstop, but apparently she’d been hanging out with the gyaru girls since middle school, and yet she has no experience with guys. Or so the story goes.

“But you’ve watched p●rn, right? Like that one I was watching before—《Heart-Pounding! Swimsuit Competition Full of Former Gravure Idols! Nothing But Wardrobe Malfunctions!》—you had five or six of those popping up like it was nothing.”

“I-I mean, that stuff’s basically blurred out… so it’s hard to tell size or anything, y’know…”

Yuria said it, embarrassed enough that her ears went bright red.

So damn lewd.

“S-so, uh… just to check… yours, Ryouta… is it big?”

“H-huh!? Where’d that come from all of a sudden!?”

If I said “Pun intended,” I had a feeling Yuria would punch me, so I kept it in my head.

“It’s just… like… for reference, I wanna know, y’know?”

“Reference for what?”

“Just tell me. You’ve been touching my thighs all over the place, and then when it’s about you, you won’t say anything—like, that’s not fair, right?”

“U-uh…”

Well, if telling her my p●n●s size means I get unlimited thigh-touching rights… that’s like fishing for caviar with an empty can.

“M-mine is… well? I think it’s probably on the bigger side compared to average. Maybe.”

“For real? But when we went to the pool, in the changing room Tanaka said your size is like an edamame pod.”

“…Huh?”

Ta… Ta-ta, Tanakaaaaa!!

That bastard! Spouting random crap again!!

“Everything Tanaka says is a lie! And there’s no way she’d even know my size in the first place!”

“R-really? B-but in that convo, Rui was like, ‘Yeah, totally,’ so I figured maybe both Tanaka and Rui heard it from you, Ryouta.”

Why is Rui acting like she knows, too!?

I’ve never talked about that even once, and I definitely haven’t shown it either!

“There’s no way I’d go up to a girl and say, ‘My p●n●s size is an edamame pod,’ okay!? It’s all lies! Seriously, what kind of conversation are you people even having!?”

“I mean, like… it just kinda happens, y’know. Like it just turns into lewd-talk.”

I don’t really get it, but… are girls just like that? No—this is 100% Tanaka’s fault.

Yeah. That girl clearly needs a bit of “education.”

“Haaah. I’d been thinking about that for ages, so I’m relieved it’s a lie.”

“Thinking about it for ages? You mean my p●n●s size?”

“Ah… n-no! That’s not it! I mean, not your p●n●s specifically—I mean why those two even know about it!”

So in the end, it’s about my p●n●s after all.

I mean, sure, I’m the weird one, but Yuria’s got her own kind of weird too, huh.

By the time we were having that conversation, we’d already arrived in front of Yuria’s room.

“This is my room. It’s a little messy, but sit wherever you want.”

“Y-yo. Pardon the intrusion!”

“What is that reply, like you’re some club underclassman?”

Prompted to go in, I stepped into Yuria’s room.

This was my first time entering a girl’s room, it was hard to even imagine what a girl’s room was supposed to be like, but… it was so much like I’d been reincarnated into another world that, for me, a whole “different world” spread out right there.

Surrounded by pale-pink and white walls, the spacious room had depth to it. Fancy furniture and cute plushies were lined up everywhere in neat rows, red-and-white curtains hung by the window, and under the desk with the PC sat a pink-and-yellow leopard-print rug.

In the corner there was a white dresser that screamed expensive, and along an enormous built-in bookshelf—integrated right into the wall—nearly a hundred different fashion magazines were lined up in chronological order.

Even though Yuria herself said it was “messy,” the floor was completely clean, and everything was so tidily organized it looked like a robot vacuum could run around as much as it wanted.

“Y-Yuria’s room… it’s so clean… and it smells so, so much like Yuria… fffwwhh…”

“Hey! Taking a deep breath the second you step into a girl’s room is seriously gross! …Well, I guess I’m glad you didn’t say I smell.”

“Like I’d ever think you smell bad, Yuria! I could easily eat, like, ten bowls of white rice off Yuria’s scent alone—”

“Oh my god! Quit it, it’s gross!”

She said that, but Yuria still looked a little shy, too.

The only one who’ll laugh and accept my gross comments is Yuria.

Having a relationship where I can be honest and say whatever… that’s a nice thing.

“Huh? Come to think of it, there’s no 《Chichi-kyun》 or other moe-anime goods around… are you hiding them?”

“Obviously. I Rui and Airi come over a lot—there’s no way I can just display that stuff in here.”

“Yeah… that’s fair.”

“My otaku goods are in the hobby room next door. There’s a bunch of games over there too, so we’ll go there later… but before that, um—”

Yuria fidgeted and looked away.

“R-right now… I want you to look at this me, kinda.”

“This? What do you mean—”

“H-here! This!”

Yuria forcefully yanked her own middle-school yearbook out from the bookshelf and shoved it into my hands.

Ah, so she wants to show me her middle-school photos?

Jeez. Going out of your way to show someone your past self… you can only do that because you’re aware about how cute you are, huh…

My middle-school yearbook? Just looking at it would make me want to burn it as fast as possible—it screams “introvert” (and, just like always, Tanaka was a glasses-wearing introvert).

“Huh—so this is middle-school Yuria. Oh, there’s a sports festival photo too… your thighs were big even back then, weren’t they.”

“Where are you looking. Seriously, you always look at that.”

“Well, obviously the thighs, but… Yuria, you’re still just ridiculously cute, aren’t you?”

“…!”

“It really hit me looking at this class photo—your height, your style, you’re taller than the guys, and on top of that your face is insanely cute… having someone this amazing in the same class is so unfair the other girls start feeling sorry for.”

“…W-well, duh. Of course. I work hard too, y’know.”

She said it with a tsun-tsun attitude, but the corners of her mouth had softened a little.

I wasn’t trying to butter her up. I just gave my honest opinion… but it looks like Yuria got a little happy about being praised.

Well, it’s always better when Yuria’s in a good mood, since she lets me touch her thighs.

“So, like… Yuria, you must’ve been popular since middle school, right?”

“Yeah, honestly? I was. For a while, I even got confessed to by guys, like, basically every week, but…”

“Huh!? Every week!? For real!?”

“But… even if I made a boyfriend, I couldn’t believe he’d understand the other me. And then the whole thing where I fought with a friend just made it worse, and I started getting scared to talk to anyone about my otaku hobbies… even when I first met you at the arcade, Ryouta, I was pretty intense, right?”

Now that she says it… yeah, that does ring a bell.

Even the Yuria who’s completely fallen for me (according to our company’s metrics) used to be seriously wary of me back then, and she glared hard enough to warp that pretty face of hers.

Maybe she really was that guarded—so much it’s hard to imagine now.

“It’s a pain, right. This part of me.”

“…Yuria.”

With Yuria, being this much of a beauty actually worked against her, and joining an otaku group and blending in would be close to impossible.

But she wanted to live as both versions of herself—her gyaru self and her otaku self… and I’d heard before that the difficulty of the human relationships born from that was what tormented her.

Sure, these days even popular kids can like anime, but that tends to be limited to works that are mainstream-friendly.

And of all things, what Yuria got super into was that R17.9999 late-night anime, 《Chichi-kyun》.

“Anyway! I don’t need a boyfriend or anything… ’cause right now, I’ve got you, Ryouta.”

“M-me?”

“Yeah. You’re the one who understands me, Ryouta, and I’m the one who understands you the most, right? So at this point, like… I seriously don’t need some understanding boyfriend or whatever?”

“I-I don’t really get it, but… is that how it is?”

Since Yuria said it like it was obvious, I just kinda nodded along.

Because I’m someone who understands both the normal Yuria and the otaku Yuria, she doesn’t need an understanding boyfriend? Is that what she means?

“So that’s how it works, huh? I honestly figured since people say your sex drive is strong, Yuria, you’d want a boyfriend one way or another.”

“Hah!? I-I mean, sure, my sex drive is… I-I have it, but it’s not like it’s strong!”

“Huh? But you’ve let me touch your thighs and stuff.”

“No! The thigh thing is only ’cause you kept thinking about my thighs all the time! Why are you talking like I’m the one who let you touch me!”

“I mean, I admit I’ve been staring at Yuria’s thighs every day like I’m licking them with my eyes, but I haven’t said I want to touch them that much.”

“W-what kind of sneaky excuse is that. Obviously staring at thighs means you wanna touch them, right?”

No, it’s different… visually molesting Yuria’s thighs is less “I want to touch them” and more “I want to knead and ravage them,” so it looks similar but it’s totally different.

“Anyway, putting that aside. Talking like this in your room, Yuria… it really made my nerves just kinda vanish. Maybe I let down my guard the most when I’m talking with you.”

“R-really? More than ‘Tanaka’?”

“Why is Tanaka coming up there!?”

I’d been enjoying a nice chat with Yuria in her room, and then suddenly Tanaka slurping ramen popped into my brain, and I was in full ‘Wait, what about the porn manga I was reading until just now!?’ mode.

“I mean, y’know… Tanaka’s still the one who’s been with you the longest, Ryouta. So I kinda end up comparing, I guess.”

“Even if you say ‘been with,’ my history with Tanaka only started in middle school. We didn’t know each other at all when we were little, so it’s not like it’s that long—”

“When we were little… oh, right, right. Speaking of when we were little, there’s something I was planning to show you when you came.”

Yuria went back to the bookshelf again and handed me a certain book she’d taken from the lower shelf.

“This… it’s my treasure, the one I told you about before… but…”

It was a volume of Lucky & H.

“Lucky & H…”

Come to think of it, before, Yuria reacted really strongly to the same book in my room, but was that because this was the series that got her into being an otaku…?

“This is my treasure. Like I told you before, I got it from a boy I played with in the park just one time when I was in elementary school, and when I read it, I started admiring the gyaru in the story, and then I got hooked on both gyaru culture and otaku culture at the same time, kinda.”

Looking at the book with gentle eyes, Yuria said it like she was reminiscing.

Lucky & H is Yuria’s origin story, huh.

It’s exactly what the title suggests—a shounen-magazine school romcom that keeps hitting you with lucky pervert developments one after another—and if you told me that “Yuria’s origin is liking 《Chichi-kyun》,” I could kinda accept that too, given the vibe.

I opened the volume I’d received from Yuria.

Maybe because it was a first edition, the cover and pages were a little sunburnt and faded.

“Huh? …Hey, Yuria. There’s a sentai card stuck in the middle of this volume.”

“Oh, that? I think the boy who gave me this manga gave it to me with the card still tucked inside. I never saw him again after that, so I just left it there.”

Putting a wafer card in a manga… huh.

I remember doing that too—slipping duplicate cards I didn’t need into manga so they wouldn’t warp from humidity or bend.

And that card… it’s a pink power ranger.

Come to think of it, when I was in elementary school, I was desperate to buy power ranger wafers too.

Those hazy childhood memories start slowly sharpening into focus.

Back then… I think I also liked the pink power ranger, didn’t I?

While the boys in my class admired the red with pure, innocent hearts, I was a precocious brat already showing hints of perversion, and I remember that the pink power ranger was my favorite.

I mean, the pink power ranger at the time had such an insanely erotic body that she later switched careers into gravure at a line so borderline it was ridiculous, and my precocious little heart (crotch) got completely sniped.

Back then I was a wafer-kid across all kinds of series, and I started buying power ranger wafers like a man possessed. Every month I’d clutch my allowance and go to the only nearby supermarket that stocked those power ranger wafers.

But after the power ranger series with my favorite pink ended, the wafers slowly disappeared stores, and I have this faint memory of how disappointed I was.

It was before online shopping was as common as it is now, and it wasn’t like I could beg my parents to let me buy boxes, so I was desperate.

So I decided I’d have to buy them myself before production ended completely, and as long as it was within biking range, I basically covered nearly every supermarket, convenience store, and even dagashi shop in Natsuhama City—looping around and around buying those sentai wafers and collecting pink cards and stickers.

Yeah. Even as a grade-schooler, I was doing what you’d call stan-behavior these days.

“What’s up, Ryouta?”

“Ah, no… it just feels kinda nostalgic. I bought these wafers a lot too, and I used to tuck cards into manga and stuff. When you’re a kid, filing things is a pain, so you do it a lot, right?”

“Huh… yeah. Figures.”

“Huh? Yuria?”

Yuria’s face turned weirdly clear and composed, and then she grabbed both my shoulders hard and looked me straight in the eyes.

“Hey, Ryouta. Listen properly.”

“H-huh… o-okay.”

“It really is… the one who gave me this manga… it was you, wasn’t it? Ryouta.”

Me… the one who gave Yuria Lucky & H!?

Does that mean I’m the one who turned Yuria into an otaku?

But… is that even possible?

Yuria definitely said that boy was someone she met for the first time, and that they only played together once.

But if, while I was doing my dagashi-shop rounds, I happened to drop by some park, played with Yuria, and then just happened to give her this manga I had on me on my way home… it’s true the pieces would fit.

If Yuria’s guess is right, it’d be one of those “fated reunions” you see in romance manga… except the person in question—me—didn’t remember it.

And yeah, not remembering is one thing, but if it wasn’t me, then the whole story changes.

“Hey, Ryouta—tell me the truth? Did you forget about it?”

“N-no, you can’t just suddenly ask me that…”

Honestly, I don’t remember much from elementary school at all—hell, I didn’t even remember the whole incident with Rui back then.

Like that thing with Rui… I think it’s amazing that both Yuria and Rui can remember a single day so vividly for so long.

And if you’re going to say that, Airi’s wafer thing is the same… did they really feel like fate?

“Haaah… why don’t you remember? Seriously.”

“Sorry, Yuria. But when I was a kid, I was into the big-boobed older sister next door, and my tastes got warped by the pervy pink power ranger, and I just… wasn’t interested in girls my age at all, or—”

“Hah!? Oh my god! I called you all the way over and even showed you the book, so remember already!”

Yuria clamped my head in both hands and shook it hard, like some Showa-era old man trying to fix a broken appliance.

“Seriously… today was supposed to be about making you remember that.”

“Huh!? I thought the main event was the maid cosplay!?”

“Ah—well, that’s…”

“I get to take unlimited shots of Yuria’s huge-thigh maid cosplay, right!?”

“Your libido is insane… yeah, I get it. I’ll wear it properly.”

Yuria frowned like she was disappointed, and gave me that same look she always uses on a disgusting otaku.

“Jeez… wanting to see my cosplay that badly, Ryouta—don’t you like me way too much?”

“Well, I mean, I’m into your thi—”

The doorbell rang.

Right then, out of nowhere, the intercom sounded.

“Huh? Who could it be… I’ll go check.”

…Her parents are overseas, right?

I swept my gaze around Yuria’s room as a bad feeling crept up on me.

A visitor this early in the morning? Who would that even be?

I can’t imagine this Western-style high-class residential area still has a “circular notice board” culture… and even if it were an acquaintance, they’d know Yuria’s parents are out of the country.

[Note: “circular notice board” refers to Japan’s kairan-ban (回覧板), a traditional system where a clipboard or folder is literally passed house-to-house with community announcements.]

If that’s the case, then it has to be someone Yuria knows… but considering Yuria’s background—how in middle school her best friend in the gyaru group found out about her otaku hobby and she ended up a loner gyaru—if you say “someone she knows,” it feels like it had to be someone from our school.

Someone from our school… and if so, only two people come to mind

Airi… or Rui…

But Airi said she’d be busy all day today with a one-off job.

Which means the one it could be is…!

“Don’t tell me… it’s Rui?”

The moment that thought hit me, my heart started pounding, a chill ran through me, and my body began to tremble.

Then, from out in the hallway, I heard footsteps—tap, tap—on marble tile.

N-no… this is bad! The footsteps are getting closer!

If Rui saw me in a place like this, it wouldn’t be “I’m vice president starting second semester” anymore!

Rui’s got an unusually strong possessive streak, or something—when I’m friendly with the other two (and Tanaka too), she closes in with the kind of intensity that looks like she might seriously k●ll me.

And if she found out I was here, alone, one-on-one in Yuria’s room… student council ban, here I come…

“I-I can’t… I gotta hide!”

I immediately looked for somewhere I could hide.

Luckily, Yuria’s room is so huge you could call it a proper young-lady room without exaggeration, and there’s plenty of furniture and closets, so there are tons of hiding spots.

But realistically, the options are: a closet with enough room inside, behind the big curtains by the window that could hide multiple people, and lastly…

The bed.

No time to think. I can’t get cold feet!

Alright… it has to be!

“It’s gotta be the bed, obviouslyyyy!!!”

Without a moment’s hesitation, I torpedo-dived right into the bed.

I-I mean! It’s not like I wanted an excuse to shove my face into Yuria’s bed under the guise of “unavoidable circumstances,” okay!? (Dead serious.)

I “held my breath” inside Yuria’s bed… except of course I don’t, and I’m breathing like crazy.

“Th-this is the scent of Yuria’s be—”

“Hey, Ryouta… what the hell are you doing?”

While I was “holding my breath” (by our company’s standards), Yuria casually lifted the comforter and looked down at me with eyes full of disbelief and contempt.

The person next to Yuria is… huh? There’s… nobody else?

“I mean, explaining is probably pointless… but did you seriously get turned on in my room?”

“N-no! It’s not that! It’s not, Yuria! This is— I thought Rui came, so I tried to hide immediately—”

“Hah? Rui? Like she’d come.”

“B-but—”

“Why Rui, anyway?”

“That’s…”

Yuria doesn’t know that if Rui found out I’m here with her like this, there’d be punishment waiting (in a certain sense).

Yuria couldn’t possibly understand my suffering.

“Well, I don’t really get it, but even if Rui did come, hiding in my bed is… Ryouta being Ryouta, you just wanted to sniff-sniff my bed, didn’t you?”

“Th-that’s—!”

“Bullseye. Seriously, if I take my eyes off you, I never know what you’re gonna do… I mean, if you wanna sniff it that bad, I don’t mind—”

“Huh?”

“A-anyway!! It’s not a visitor or anything—it’s a delivery. Something I ordered earlier, and I set the delivery date for today.”

“For cosplay? D-don’t tell me, Yuria…! For me!?”

Not just the maid cosplay—she’ll wear some pervy cosplay too!?

All my anxiety from earlier vanished, and blood rushed straight to my lower half.

“Yeah. I got a special cosplay ready—just for you, Ryouta.”

“All riiight! Damn, Yuria, you’re so into this!”

“Heh… okay then. Let’s go to the otaku room.”

Dragged along by an oddly hype Yuria, I headed for Yuria’s otaku room.

 

☆☆

 

“This is… my otaku room.”

The otaku room was unified with chic furniture, and along the shelves lining the walls, beautiful-girl figures were displayed so densely there was barely space. The bookcase held manga and light novels in neat rows, and tapestry hangings fluttered lightly on the walls.

“Well? Pretty amazing, right?”

“This isn’t just ‘amazing’—it’s on a whole other level! I’m getting so fired up!”

Since she’s an otaku who’s lived in the same era I have, the genres she’s into overlap with mine way too perfectly, and it’s making me excited.

Yuria’s a girl-otaku too, just like Tanaka, so I figured she might surprisingly dabble in BL and stuff, but… Yuria seems more like an NL-only type.

Even the manga on her shelves were basically all romcoms or ero-coms, and while it wasn’t yuri, there was a noticeable amount of “girls fighting with their proud boobs” type series.

Well, considering she’s a huge fan of 《Chichi-kyun》, that’s probably a given.

“Still… no one in the whole school would believe that Yuria—the No. 1 gyaru in the whole school—has basically covered the same kinds of works I have.”

“I’m proud of it though, y’know? If I get to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with a high-level otaku like you, Ryouta.”

“I-is that so?”

I don’t really know what “high-level” even means… but Yuria being able to take pride in being an otaku is probably why we click so well.

In addition, the latest TV in the back of the room—probably over 60 inches—had everything from the latest game consoles to nostalgic retro hardware lined up, and because they were bought secondhand, they still had those “operation checked” stickers on them.

Huh, she even collects retro games… looking at it like this really shows how wide Yuria’s otaku “range” is—wait. Hold on, look closer—what the hell!? There’s a 6●DD down there!

“H-hey, Yuria! This!”

“Oh, that? I guess it’s something my dad had a long time ago, but there aren’t any games you can play on it, so it’s basically just decoration. You want it, Ryouta?”

“L-like you could just give it to me! Store more carefully!”

“Oh. Okay.”

From the look of it, when it comes to retro games, she’s just keeping her dad’s old stuff around.

“More importantly, we were gonna do cosplay. The maid outfit I bought for last year’s culture festival should be in this closet… ah—there it is, there it is.”

Yuria pulled a maid outfit out from inside the closet.

A simple, modern maid outfit.

It really was one size too small for Yuria to wear, and the skirt length… looked kinda short.

“So? What do you think, Ryouta?”

“If you wear this, your thighs are gonna be totally on display.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying. I’m only showing it to you, Ryouta.”

“O-oh… right.”

Crap. When she says it like that, it makes me happy.

“By the way, Ryouta—haven’t you noticed already? Why I’m, like, weirdly into cosplay right now.”

“Huh? Isn’t it just because you want to show me your cosplay? And maybe, if things go well, you want to do some pervy stuff in the maid outfit too, or—”

“Why are you making it sound like I’m madly in love with you, Ryouta!? We’re not doing anything pervy! And that’s not even it!”

“Huh? Then why are you so into it?”

“Jeez. Guess I’ve got no choice.”

When I asked, Yuria sighed like she was exasperated, then boldly tore open the bag that had arrived earlier.

“Huh…?”

Inside was… no way—another maid outfit in the exact same design as Yuria’s!?

“W-what is that!? Ah—don’t tell me you were embarrassed and bought a size bigger for yourself after all?”

“Nope. That’s not it. This is… something I bought for you, Ryouta.”

“Huh? Wait, what are you—”

“Hey, Ryouta. The only ones allowed to look at cosplay… are the ones prepared to be seen in cosplay.”

Yuria declared it with a doya-face that said, Gotcha.

Hearing that made a chill run through me, and my chest started to stir with unease.

Don’t tell me… somewhere along the way, I’d gone from the hunter to the hunted… is that what this means!?

“C’mon, Ryoutaaaa~ Let’s get you undressed, undressed~”

“S-stop—ahh, aaAAAH!!”

By the time I’d grasped everything, it was already too late, and I ended up getting “hunted” by Yuria, no questions asked…

“Uwaa… Ryouta, you really are…”

“W-what, quit staring so much!”

Just like at the culture festival, I was being made to crossdress again.

“You so suit the maid outfit.”

“S-shut up!”

And this time… it was even the same maid outfit as Yuria’s…

Over a thin, frilly black one-piece dress, they put a white apron on me, and for some reason they also made me wear a blonde ojou-sama vertical-ringlet wig, then topped it off with a white headband.

As always, the skirt is something I’ll never get used to; no matter how many times I put it on, it feels breezy and exposed, and the “thing” downstairs can’t feel safe.

Th-this is the worst… today I’d been looking forward to the cosplay meet entirely driven by libido, and I never thought I’d take a counter like this.

“You don’t have much leg hair to begin with, Ryouta, so crossdressing looks good on you. Oh—if it grows in, tell me, okay? I’ll tidy you up with depilatory cream again, like at the culture festival.”

“I’m never shaving again!”

Smooth, hairless legs are a shame to me.

“Ahhh, I’m cracking up. Anyway, now that I got embarrassing photos of you too, your maid cosplay was just for fun—”

“Just for fun…?”

“So? What about my maid outfit? Honestly, I’m seriously embarrassed.”

While I moved back into Yuria’s room to change into the maid outfit, in the otaku room, just like she promised, Yuria had put on the maid outfit too.

It was the same black-and-white frilly maid outfit as mine… but what was completely different was the sheer volume.

Even with frills, her chest was so packed it was obvious it was squeezed tight, and her thighs spilling out from the airy one-piece skirt… no, huge thighs.

Her left and right thighs were pressed together so desperately—like a round of oshikura-manjuu—that it felt like if the skirt so much as fluttered, all sorts of things would be on full display.

[Note: Oshikura-manjū is a Japanese children’s game where players form a circle and push each other with their backs.]

“Hey, Ryouta. You’re staring at my legs way too much.”

“………”

“Hellooo, Ryouta! You listening? This isn’t a museum, y’know.”

“Ah! S-sorry, Yuria. I got so excited I literally lost my words.”

“H-huh? Seriously, you… well, you’re about what I expected, I guess.”

Yuria looked exasperated, but her cheeks also reddened a little.

I’ve been thinking it for a while now, but it seems like Yuria gets happy when you praise her thighs. What kind of fetish is that?

“Yuria’s thighs really are h-h-huge. Yeah, I can see how this is lewd enough to get you banned from the culture festival.”

“I didn’t get banned!”

“Um—may I take pictures?”

“Why are you suddenly polite… fine, whatever, but no don’t take too many shots from below.”

“Woo-hooo!”

I pulled my phone out of the apron pocket of the maid outfit and started taking cosplay photos however I liked.

Th-this is… it’s basically a “thigh buffet” now.

All-you-can-use “side dish” viewing and all-you-can-shoot photography—an ultimate buffet… and the time limit’s unlimited.

“Yuria! Can you sit in that chair next? I wanna take pictures of your thighs spread out to the sides too, y’know?”

“Haaah… fine. Seriously, Ryouta, you’re… way too into me. There are other girls with big thighs too, you know.”

“It has to be yours, Yuria! Obviously!”

“Huh…? W-why?”

“There isn’t a girl alive who’s as cute as you, has huge boobs, and huge thighs too, Yuria! You’re one of a kind to me!”

“Y-you’re getting way too fired up. O-okay, I get it—your feelings are clear. If you like me that much… come on, take more pictures.”

“Yuria… yeah!”

When I passionately preached my love for Yuria’s thighs, it seemed like Yuria understood me too.

Huh? Wait a sec… if this is how it’s going, doesn’t that mean I might be able to touch those thighs again?

Ever since that bus incident, for some reason, touching Yuria’s thighs became OK.

So this time too… I-I want to touch them.

I swallowed hard, then tucked my phone back into my pocket once.

“H-hey, Yuria.”

“What’s up? You’re getting all serious all of a sudden.”

“Uh, so… from here, can I touch your thighs—”

 

The doorbell rang in rapid succession.

 

Right as I was about to ask, the intercom cut in like it was throwing a wrench into things.

“Tch… another visitor at the worst time. Yuria, are you still trying to make me wear cosplay or what?”

“No, no—this time I seriously don’t know!”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure! Where’d all that trust in me go from when you were passionately monologuing like five seconds ago!?”

Completely consumed by suspicion, I keep talking while staring hard at her thighs.

Sorry. The only thing I can trust is these thighs…

“But wait a sec. The way the intercom is ringing…”

“What? Is it someone you know?”

“Y-yeah… sorry, Ryouta! Close your eyes for a sec.”

“Huh? O-oh, okay.”

Told to, I close my eyes.

Huh? This… sound of cloth rubbing… don’t tell me!

“Y-Yuria!? Don’t tell me you—!”

“I’m changing! If you open your eyes even a little I’ll k●ll you!”

“You’re changing!? Can I open them then!?”

“I said don’t! I’m seriously gonna gouge your eyes out, okay!?”

“Y-yes, sorry.”

With speed on par with some stylish quick-change out of a certain something-or-other, Yuria had already changed back into her casual huge-thigh hot-pants outfit.

“Don’t come out of this room, Ryouta. Got it?”

Saying that, she leaves the room.

So does that mean… this time, it really is someone she knows?

Well, it’s probably just another trap to mess with me anyway. Like the next cosplay.

…Or so I thought, but…

Judging by how panicked Yuria was, it doesn’t seem like it’s “a delivery” (cosplay) or anything… don’t tell me Rui really did come this time…

But Rui’s in the middle of Inter-High… so yeah, no way.

Then it has to be Airi, a neighbor, or maybe one of Yuria’s relatives…

“The way the intercom was ringing…”

That was the one line Yuria muttered under her breath.

If she can tell who it is just from how they ring it, that means it’s someone who comes by often, right?

But her friends are all busy… which means, don’t tell me… a b-boyfriend!?

Yuria claims “I don’t have a boyfriend,” but she’s a true-blue modern gyaru… it wouldn’t be weird at all if she did have one, would it?

And if it really is a boyfriend, that’d explain why she rushed out after quick-changing in such a hurry.

“So you finally show your tail, Yuria… after doing pervy stuff with me like this, you actually had a boyfriend this whole time…”

I mean, if her boyfriend shows up, that’s bad, isn’t it!?

Everything I’ve been doing turns into the actions of the villain in an NTR story!

“I-I have to change fast—wait, the clothes I took off are in Yuria’s bedroom…!”

While I freak out all by myself, I hear an oddly lively voice coming from the entryway.

O-okay, first I need to listen in and figure out what they’re saying.

Yuria’s otaku room is located next to her bedroom, and unlike her bedroom, it’s closer to the entryway, so if I press my ear to the door I can kinda make out voices.

Huh? The visitor’s voice is… high-pitched…

“That voice… it’s not a guy?”

Then it probably isn’t her boyfriend…

Part of me feels relieved.

Whether that relief comes from wanting to believe Yuria when she said “I don’t have a boyfriend,” or from wanting to keep touching Yuria’s thighs without any guilt from here on out… even I don’t know which it is.

Either way, this means I can touch Yuria’s thighs without holding back now.

…But if Yuria doesn’t have a boyfriend, then who the hell came? That’s the problem.

Curious, I crack the door open just a little.

And there I see… a white-T-shirt beauty with such absurdly huge bust even from the gap in the door you can tell—wait!

“Sooorry, Yuria! I didn’t message first!”

A-ahh, Airi!?

Maybe because it’s even hotter today, Airi was standing by the entryway in a thin white T-shirt and half pants—an outfit like a bug-catching little boy.

So the reason Yuria recognized the intercom ringing was… because it was Airi, huh!?

But that’s weird. Airi was supposed to be working today.

“What’s up? Didn’t you say you were busy with something?”

“Umm—one-off jo— I mean! Errands! The person in charge messed up, so it got canceled super last minute!”

“‘The person in charge’… what kind of errand was it, seriously?”

“U-uh, s-so anyway! I realized I still hadn’t returned the fashion magazines I borrowed from you before summer vacation started, so I brought them!”

Looks like Airi’s planned one-off job got canceled, and she suddenly had time on her hands, so she came to return the magazines she’d borrowed from Yuria.

I have no idea how she thinks her job hasn’t been found out when she’s like this… but hey, she’s also got a bright-red fake boyfriend, so maybe she’s somehow managing to cover it up.

“And to apologize for returning them late, I bought ice cream!”

Hey, hey—ice cream when it’s this hot, Airi!?

Maybe it’s because it’s hot that she got ice cream, but if you bring ice cream on a day this hot, then what happens next is definitely—

“Heyyy, the ice cream’s gonna melt, so let me in, Yuriaaa~ I wanna go into an air-conditioned room too~”

And just like that, the flow turns into her coming inside.

Come to think of it, I feel like Airi said before that the AC at her house is old and doesn’t cool well.

You little… so returning the magazines was just a pretense, and bringing “apology ice cream” was your way of coming over to cool off at Yuria’s place, wasn’t it…?

Of all times… Yuria, what are you gonna do?

Yuria hid my shoes that were at the entryway, but Airi’s got a sharp nose, and if things keep going like this, it feels like a lot of stuff is about to go very bad.

“Uh… okay. Come on in, come on in.”

Even though she thought for a moment, Yuria decided quickly.

No matter what, there’s no way she can say, “Sorry, we’re having a pervy cosplay session with Ryouta today.”

“Excuse meee! Wahh! Even the hallway in your house is freezing-cold, Yuria! It’s amaaazing!”

Sure, it might be freezing-cold, but our hearts are pounding like crazy over here.

As I peeked at the two of them through the gap in the door, a notification suddenly popped up on my phone—tucked into the apron of my maid outfit.

“Huh? From Yuria?”

‘Yuria: I’m sure you get the situation, but do NOT come out of that otaku room. Got it?’

Yuria… o-okay. I get it.

I replied with an anime stamp that said ‘Roger’ and shut my phone.

But thinking about it, staying in this room is a relief.

And Airi will probably leave once she eats her ice cream—she shouldn’t stick around long.

So I’ll just relax in here, look at Yuria’s otaku goods, and—

“…Ah, this is…”

That was when it happened.

I gently placed a hand over my lower half.

Crap… thanks to the relief and sage time, it’s come after me…

—m-my urge to pee.

“No, no, no! You’ve gotta be kidding me!”

Right in the middle of the snack aisle, like a bratty kid stomping his feet, I kept stamping in place over and over.

Alright. Calm down and organize the situation.

I am the filthy-pervy high schooler, Izumiya Ryouta.

While I was having a filthy-pervy cosplay session alone with my otaku buddy—High School’s No. 1 gyaru, Ichinose Yuria—Miyama Airi, a hard-working big-busted girl who bought “apology ice cream” to use as an excuse to cool off, suddenly showed up at the house.

From the gap in the door, I got fixated on the color of the big-bust bra faintly visible under Airi’s white T-shirt, and while I was enthralled by that, I failed to notice “another enemy” slowly closing in on my urethra.

Just as one crisis had passed and I was feeling relieved—bam. I was getting the urge to pee.

If, when Yuria came back to the room, the crotch of the maid outfit I was wearing was the only part soaked, it would inflict damage even upon Yuria’s fetishes.

On the advice of Tanapedia (I asked Tanaka about over LINE), I tried picturing the urine flowing back up in my brain… but it didn’t work!

Even if it’s small (in a certain sense), the urge to pee is the same!

You libido-filled mega-pervert!

The truth is always—no, wait! This is not the time for that!!

At this rate, I’m seriously gonna leak!!!

Yanking hard on the skirt of the maid outfit, I try to somehow hold the urge back.

“This is bad… the situation is extremely serious.”

For now, Airi and Yuria only just went into Yuria’s room.

If I leave the otaku room next door now, the chances of running into them are… basically none.

But the biggest problem is: I don’t know where the toilet is.

There’s a very real chance I’ll “game over” while I’m flailing around with my crotch held down.

C-crap. I should’ve asked where the bathroom was at the start.

For now, I move deeper into the room and press my ear flat to the wall.

I need to grasp what kind of conversation those two are having.

‘Man, it’s been forever since I’ve been in your room, Yuriaaa. Ahh, it’s cool in here~’

‘I-is it…?’

‘Huh? There’s, like, folded men’s clothes here… and this smell…’

H-hey, hey, hey, that’s bad!

Hide it, Yuria, hurry!

‘Ah! That!? That’s like, clothes Ryouta didn’t need anymore that I got from him, or… I wanted to work more mens-like clothing into my fashion, so—’

What kind of excuse is that? It’s so painfully forced I’m about to leak over here.

‘Ryouta’s… I want that.’

‘Huh? H-hey, what are you even saying, Airi?’

‘Ah—no! I mean! Airi wants to try wearing men’s clothes too! So! If they were clothes he didn’t need, give them to Airi too!’

‘…Ah, yeah. Okay. I’ll give them to you, Airi.’

‘Yaaay! I’ll treasure them—Ryouta’s clothes!’

Yuria just went ahead and transferred the clothes I’d come wearing to Airi on her own.

H-hey, you…! That was the outfit I just bought—stretching a bit—for when I hang out with Yuria!

And if she gives that away, I’ll be left with nothing but this maid outfit…

“W-wait, more importantly! While they’re distracted by clothes, now’s my chance!”

Deciding to head for the bathroom, I immediately exit the otaku room.

Yuria’s house is enormous to begin with, but if there’s a bathroom, it should be… this way.

Trusting my instincts, I run around searching for the toilet.

And then… just as my urge hit its limit.

“Ah… there it is!!!”

“huff, huff”

I finally reached my safe haven.

Toilets, bathrooms—they exist… in the corner of every household, you know…

Even while I’m right on the verge of leaking, I carefully pinch the hem of my skirt and head for the toilet…!

“Huhhh? Ah—! Are you maybe Yuria’s house’s maid?”

Right as I was about to go in, Airi walked up behind me with ice cream on the tip of her nose and spoke to me.

I finally made it to my safe haven (the bathroom), and yet… to get found right before I go in…!

“Curly blonde hair, and you’re taaall! Yuria’s house even has an overseas maid too—so cool!”

L-looks like Airi thinks I’m an actual maid.

Even if I’m cosplaying with a blonde wig and a maid outfit and all that, my face is obviously me—she should’ve noticed…

Then again, when we were getting ready for cosplay, Yuria did put a bit of makeup on my face, so maybe that’s working?

Even so, Airi’s got a famously good nose—she should’ve noticed me by smell—

“Huh…? Sniff-sniff. This maid… smells the same as Airi’s friend.”

The instant I heard that, I got so shocked it felt like my eyes and voice were about to pop right out.

H-her sense of smell is like a police dog’s… what is this, seriously!?

So her “not-quite-human” trait isn’t limited to just that massive bust, then.

“F-friend…?”

“Yeah! The same smell as Airi’s friend!”

This is bad… even Airi might figure it out at this rate.

If it’s come to this, I’ve got no choice but to invent a setting and talk my way through it!

“I-I am a distant relative of Yuria-sama! While Yuria-sama’s parents are overseas, I have been appointed as the maid of this household! I have absolutely no relation whatsoever to Airi-sama’s friend! And to say I smell the same—what kind of person could that possibly be, I’d love to meet them myself, yes indeed—!”

Using the all-out falsetto voice and acting chops I once used in that play, I spew lie after lie, trying to somehow get through the moment.

“You’d love to meet them? Maid, you want to know about Airi’s friend?”

“Ah—no, that’s not what I meant…”

“Then I’ll tell you! Um, okay—he’s a boy who always plays with Airi—”

She’s started something… but judging from this reaction, I guess it’s safe to say I managed to fool her?

Does she seriously not realize it’s me…? I mean, if that’s the case, then if I intentionally cause lucky-pervert accidents again (an overwhelming contradiction) and grope her boobs, it would count as a first offense and I’d be forgiven, right…?

“And he’s also a suuuper pervy friend who’s always staring at Airi’s boobs!”

While I was fantasizing about groping Airi’s boobs, extra elements started getting added to “my” introduction.

A-Airi, what kind of introduction is that!?

When she talks about me to other people, does she always describe me like this…?

“But, y’know… he’s always nice to Airi, he praises me a lot, he often treats me to meals, and he keeps Airi’s secrets properly. So Airi… thinks of him as…”

“Huh…”

“Ah—! Never mind, it’s nothing!”

W-what is with this girl… what am I to her, anyway!?

“And also! That boy—I became friends with him in high school, but I totally think he’s the boy who gave Airi candy at the dagashi shop a long time ago!”

“O-oh, I see, I see—”

“It’s true! When he gave me a wafer before, it felt the same as back then—! Ah, I guess there’s no point telling the maid about that. Sorry.”

So Airi still believes I’m the “wafer prince” she met in the past.

I mean, I doubt it… but I literally just got grilled about the same thing by Yuria too.

I was an introvert even in elementary school, but I was an “active-leaning” introvert, so it wouldn’t be weird if I’d unconsciously helped someone out like I did with Rui…

“But it surprised me that you smell the same as Ryouta. Airi’s nose is really good, so I can tell all sorts of things by smell, but I’ve never smelled someone who smells the same as Ryouta before!”

“Ah… I had been doing cleaning work in the washroom until just now, so I may smell unpleasant.”

“You don’t smell unpleasant! You smell really nice. Maybe it’s the same detergent as Ryouta’s?”

Airi comes even closer, sniff-sniffing as she twitches her nose.

Oh no—if you get that close, that’s… seriously…

Because she believes I’m a maid of the same sex, she comes even closer to sniff me than she usually does when she’s with me.

A nice shampoo scent wafted from Airi’s hair as she approached me, and the bra showing through that white T-shirt…

And in response, my blood starts concentrating into my lower half all at once.

Th-this might, in a way, completely suppress the urge to pee… but it would also blow up her assumption that I was a woman.

Hurry and get into the bathroom to pee, or at point-blank range, stare at Airi’s body while inhaling her scent as hard as I can…

Truly, the ultimate choice…!

“No—ah, crap, I’m gonna… leak…”

“Hm? What’s wrong, Maid?”

I turn my back to Airi while holding the skirt down tight.

D-don’t pick libido over the urge to pee right now, me!

If I leak at this age, I’ll socially die!

“Um, I am in the middle of cleaning the washroom, so I shall return to the toilet! By the way, Airi-sama, might you also be here for the washroom?”

“Nope. Airi’s ice cream I bought earlier melted a little, and it got on my hand when I opened it, so I just came to wash up!”

“I-is that so…”

It’s not just her hand. There’s vanilla ice cream on her nose too.

“A-anyway, I shall return to my cleaning, yes indeed—”

“Okay! Good luck, Maid!”

Cheered on by Airi, I dive into the bathroom and boldly hike up my skirt.

And just like that, I was freed from everything.

 

☆☆

 

Whew… I made it. Somehow… just barely.

With the sound of running water at my back, I left the bathroom, washed my hands, and headed to the otaku room.

I almost ended up peeing myself at this age… and in a classmate’s house, no less.

If I’d leaked, it would’ve left a black mark on my history—seriously, thank god I made it.

Though honestly, at the point where I’m crossdressing (cosplay) at a classmate’s house and pretending to be a maid in front of a classmate, I feel like “black mark” has already lost all meaning.

“…Huh?”

As I walk down the hallway, I hear a shout from the direction of Yuria’s room: ‘Hah!?’

It’s getting noisy… wait, don’t tell me.

When I get back to the otaku room, I immediately press my ear to the wall again and listen in.

‘W-wait! Hah!? A maid!?’

‘Yeah! Like, blonde, and her hair was all curly like she came from overseas? Yuria, your house hired a maid now! So cool!’

‘………That bastard.’

D-damn it, Airi! Running your mouth about stuff you don’t need to!

Not only did Yuria find out I left the room—she found out I pretended to be a maid too.

‘Huh? Don’t tell me, Yuria… you don’t get along with the maid?’

‘Ah—no, it’s not like that…’

‘Oh, right, right! That maid, y’know, she smelled the same as Ryouta. Weird, right?’

‘…Hey, Airi, sorry. I’m gonna go “check on the maid’s work,” so make yourself comfortable.’

Th-this is… don’t tell me.

Cold sweat seeps into the inner layer under my maid outfit as I look toward the door from the corner of my eye.

Then, slowly, Yuria—wearing the face of an oni—walked in…

“Ryouta… can’t you follow my orders?”

“S-sorry!”

“Or what—ever since that play, did you develop a habit of  cross dressing in public? Huh?”

In full-on genuinely pissed mode, Yuria narrowed her eyes and kept closing the distance between us.

“I-I’m sorry! I really do think I did something wrong!”

“If you’re sorry then why’d you come out!? What if Airi found out!?”

“Th-that’s why I said I’m sorry!”

“If Airi found out, she’d have thought I’m some pervert who makes you cross dress and then drags you into dirty play, okay!?”

“Like hell Airi has that kind of imagination!”

She didn’t even realize it was me, and it’s Airi, okay? There’s no way she’d think that far.

I mean, considering she really did make me cross dress and take a bunch of pictures, maybe calling Yuria a pervert isn’t exactly wrong… or is it just me?

“And for the record, for the sake of my honor: I didn’t want that kind of play. I only went out because I had to use the bathroom. I thought it’d be bad if I leaked. So please forgive me, Yuria.”

“Huh… that’s what it was…? Sorry, Ryouta. I panicked and got mad. You’re a pervert, so I thought you might just get excited by that kind of play like it’s normal.”

W-why is it always “pervert, pervert” with me…? Well, I guess with the way I stare at and touch her thighs all the time, maybe it can’t be helped.

“Also, I’m sorry about the clothes. When I tried to cover it up, the conversation went in a weird direction. If I’d refused to give them to her right then, I felt like Airi would think ‘it’s because I like Ryouta’ or something.”

Yuria looked apologetic, and yet her cheeks reddened.

Red in the face… is she really that averse to Airi misunderstanding and thinking she likes me?

Well, I can always buy more clothes later, and the important thing is that nothing got found out.

“C’mon, Yuria. Don’t worry about the clothes. That was just trouble happening.”

“B-but! Because of me, your—!”

“It’s one cheap outfit… more importantly, I’m glad you’re okay, Yuria.”

“R-Ryouta… you really are… so kind…”

“Ah, but in exchange, it’s equivalent exchange. I gave up my clothes, so give me the clothes you’re wearing right now, Yuria!”

“…………Huh?”

The moment I asked for Yuria’s freshly-taken-off, still-warm casual clothes, her eyes instantly went dead.

Trying to use my own clothes as bait to get Yuria’s freshly-taken-off, still-warm casual clothes… I am now the lowest, most filthy, perverted alchemist alive.

“N-no, I’m not giving them to you. And like—what would you even do with my clothes?”

“That’s… c’mon. Asking that is kind of tacky, isn’t it?”

“Agh! You’re the worst! Seriously gross! And it’s embarrassing!”

Yuria refused while smacking me with little pow-pow hits.

Yeah, okay… I guess she really won’t give me her freshly-worn, still-warm clothes… damn it.

“I can’t believe I even for a second thought you were cool… Ryouta, you idiot! You should just spend the day in your underwear!”

“Huh!? I can spend the day in your underwear at Yuria’s house!? S-sorry, but I react to stuff right away, so I might defile your eyes over my boxers though—”

“Oh my god! Put clothes on! I’ll buy you new ones at a boutique later and pay you back, okay!?”

With everything having gone completely off the rails, Yuria left the otaku room with her face bright red.

 

☆☆

 

How much time has passed since then…?

After various things (in a certain sense), Yuria told me to stay quiet in the room, so I’d been lazing around inside, still in the maid outfit.

“That Airi… she’s staying longer than I expected…”

It’s probably already been over an hour since she came.

Well, it’s not like Airi has any way of knowing I’m here, and Yuria is Yuria—she seems to be getting really into a cosmetics conversation with Airi, so it doesn’t feel like things are going to wrap up anytime soon.

It’s kind of like when your mom runs into her friend at the supermarket and then starts chatting forever.

But that’s one of Yuria’s good points, too.

Even though I’m in trouble in the next room, she doesn’t treat Airi coldly—she properly hosts her as a guest.

That sounds easy, but it’s hard to actually do.

Because if, say, Tanaka walked into the room while I was in the middle of “doing it” with Yuria, I’d definitely kick Tanaka out without hesitation, and thinking about that makes Yuria feel like she’s got some impressive composure… though honestly, I don’t think there’s any situation where I’d be “doing it” with her in the first place.

“Yuria’s a downer gyaru, but the fact that she’s actually kind and cares about her friends… that’s something only I get about her, huh.”

While I was doing that whole “back-row boyfriend face” thing for Yuria, I heard a door open from the hallway and the sound of the two of them walking down the hall.

Oh—so Airi’s finally leaving.

Well, she’s got her own stuff going on too, so if she managed to cool off even a little in Yuria’s room, then all my effort pretending to be a maid was worth it.

Summer vacation’s still going, so next time I’ll invite her to my room and host her for as many hours as she wants in a room blasting the AC.

Not because I’m after anything. I just want her to show me a little of that big bust, damp with sweat—that’s all.

“Ryouta, I’m coming in.”

“O-oh.”

After seeing Airi out, Yuria came back to the otaku room.

“Airi’s gone already.”

“You two were having fun talking for a while, huh. Meanwhile I’m stuck next door, lonely, ‘confined’ like this.”

“It’s not confinement, is it? Well, it’s definitely bad if you come out, though.”

That is what you call confinement.

“Anyway, don’t get so mad. More importantly—look, as an apology for all the various things, I’ll pick out some clothes for you, Ryouta. Wanna go to a nearby mall or something?”

“Yeah… but I don’t think I can exactly go out dressed like this.”

“I figured you’d say that, so I brought replacement clothes. Just wear whatever my dad always wears, okay?”

Yuria spread out a few outfits from the bag she was holding—clothes she said her dad normally wears… but.

“Why are they all Hawaiian shirts!?”

All she pulled out were collared shirts designed with tropical leaves and hibiscus.

“And there are sunglasses too. Here.”

Yuria put the sunglasses on me and smiled, satisfied.

Even if it is midsummer… dressing me up like some flashy tropical pick-up guy…

Airi, give me my clothes back after all.

“So, once you change into that, wanna go shopping? Ryouta.”

“Haaah… fine.”

 

☆☆

 

As Yuria told me to, I ended up wearing the clothes she prepared—her dad’s clothes.

I put on a Hawaiian shirt with bright-red hibiscus, basketball shorts, and on top of that, I hung black-gloss sunglasses from the neckline, then walked around in beach sandals… seriously, I look like a delinquent who got drunk on the summer heat and started acting up.

“No waaay! Ryouta, that look totally suits you!”

“Y-you’re absolutely making fun of me!”

Yuria looks stylish like always, like she’s dressed to go out, while I’m the only one made to look like some heat-addled delinquent… damn it.

I bit my lip, bitter, then wiped away the sweat that had been slowly beading up in the heat.

Seriously, I want to get inside that air-conditioned shopping mall already, I can’t stop sweating.

The place we’re headed right now is a large shopping mall past the high-class residential area.

That kind of mall that has everything from furniture to groceries—it’s super convenient, a place for citizens to relax, and when I was little, my family used to go on weekends a lot.

“It’s pretty close—do you go to the mall a lot with your family, Yuria?”

“Mmm… I go by myself because there’s a boutique brand I like, but I don’t really go to the mall with my family much.”

“Huh. You go on overseas trips regularly, so I figured you had, like, a party-people family vibe. That’s surprising.”

“What kind of image is that…? Oh, but lately, we do go to ‘CocoSco’ that opened near the mall, y’know? It’s like an overseas supermarket, and my parents love it.”

“CocoSco… the membership one?”

“Yep. Have you ever been to CocoSco, Ryouta? One of the sops at the food court has a drink with free refills and a hot dog together for 200 yen. Isn’t that insane?”

“Yuria… eating a hot dog…”

“Hey. Don’t speed-run pervy fantasies at the speed of light.”

“I-I’m not!”

I was just imagining Yuria opening her mouth wide and eating a hot dog (in a certain sense), okay!?

And then there’s the way she sucks on a straw (self-censored).

“So then, we’ll go buy clothes now, and on the way back we’ll stop by CocoSco? We’ll buy a ton of meat and seafood, and tonight we’ll do a barbecue.”

“That sounds great, but… I don’t have much cash on me today.”

“Jeez. With the kind of relationship we have, what are you worrying about at this point? You always help me win figures at the arcade, and more than that, my parents gave me a ton of spending money while they’re overseas. So don’t worry about it.”

“I-is that so? Sorry, then.”

Between the super-lewd maid-cos photos and everything else, I’ve been getting a lot from Yuria, so I thought at least I should cover dinner… but if that’s the case, I’ll take her up on it.

Besides, this year (hanging out with beauty trio) has been so expensive I’ve been getting advances on my allowance from my parents nonstop, so I don’t have room to be stubborn anyway—I can only rely on Yuria.

“Anyway, your clothes, Ryouta! If I’m picking them, I’m gonna make you look the coolest you’ve ever been!”

With a bright smile, Yuria’s voice bounced with energy as she suddenly grabbed my hand and took off running ahead.

“C’mon, don’t stroll. Let’s hurry up and get to that mall blasting the AC already!”

“O-okay, okay!”

Pulled along by Yuria’s hand, we arrived at the shopping mall, and she immediately led me to a boutique she recommended.

The store had a Western-style name, and inside, mannequins stood in cool outfits that looked fit for handsome guys.

To have mannequins like this make me self-aware of how lame my usual clothes are… damn it.

“Ryouta, hey, come over here.”

“Hm?”

Yuria beckoned me over, so I headed her way.

And there she was, already holding some clothes—she handed them to me.

“Hey, what do you think of this?”

She picked already, even with all these options… that’s my Yuria.

“A white knit top and black cargo pants. Both pieces are this year’s trend—oversized, loose fit—doesn’t it look pretty good?”

She’s firing off perfectly calibrated words that somehow still don’t mean anything to me.

I see… I don’t get it.

The only impression that comes to mind is some “yeah, sounds nice” kindergarten-level comment.

I mean, they do look like something a popular kid would wear, but…

“D-don’t clothes look better when they fit your body properly? If they’re this baggy, it just looks sloppy.”

“No, this is the trend right now, so stop complaining. I already got permission for you to try them on, so hurry up and put them on.”

“B-but…”

“Jeez. Haaah… fine, whatever.”

“Huh? What?”

“I might fall for you if I see you wearing these, Ryouta~”

In a completely flat, over-the-top delivery, Yuria shoved the clothes into my hands.

It was such atrocious acting it’s hard to believe she played the lead at the culture festival… I’m not the kind of guy to be swayed by a line that cheap.

But… even if it’s a trap, I don’t care! A trap is fine! A trap is fine!

“Alright. I’ll go with this.”

“Whoa, you’re so easy! What’s with that instant turnaround? You would’ve picked it even if anyone else said it, right?”

“Like hell I would! I—I decided I’d leave it to your taste, Yuria, so I thought this was fine!”

“My… huh. Well, whatever.”

After seeing Yuria’s face look just a little happy, I took the clothes into the fitting room and changed.

Yeah… annoyingly enough, these clothes are really good.

I thought baggy sleeves and pants like this in summer would just be hot, but it’s fairly breathable , and it actually sits well on me. And because it’s a loose fit, it makes someone like me—with no muscle—look a bit better filled out.

“Tch. Fine. I admit it. Yuria’s taste.”

Biting my lip, I stepped out of the fitting room.

“Oooh, Ryouta, that looks good~”

“Y-yeah.”

“Excuse me! He’ll be wearing this out, so can we pay?”

“Certainly.”

Normally I’m an edgy introvert, but thanks to Yuria’s choice, I turned into a fashion popular kid, and we left the boutique.

“It’s kinda weird. The colors are just black and white, but it still feels super popular kid, doesn’t it?”

“What kind of comment is that. There no ‘popular kid’ or ‘introvert’ fashion, is there?”

“There is! Every time I hang out with you, Yuria, I worry about my outfit so I don’t look too introverted, you know!? Even me—I’m trying hard to become a guy worthy of walking next to you, Yuria.”

“Huh… to walk next to me, huh.”

“What’s with that stupid grin!? Let me have this!”

Yuria’s mouth loosened as she chuckled softly.

She’s making a face like she’s thinking up ways to tease me.

“Well, that’s very Ryouta of you, isn’t it? Whatever the reason, being able to care about fashion is a good thing. You’re a filthy perv on the inside, but if you actually take care of your appearance properly, you’ve got the potential to be popular.”

“The ‘on the inside’ part was unnecessary. But yeah, I’m not denying I’m a pervert.”

“You’re supposed to deny it… but, y’know, when I’m looking at fashion magazines, sometimes I think, ‘If Ryouta wore this, it’d suit him.’”

“Me? You think about that?”

Even while you’re looking at sparkly fashion models, my face floats through your head? That sounds unpleasant in a pretty normal way.

…No, wait. Is this the same phenomenon as when I’m leering at a gravure photo book and the gravure idol’s face gradually turns into Yuria’s or Airi’s? (Probably not.)

“Oh, right. What about you, Ryouta? Don’t you have anything? Like clothes you want me to wear.”

“Clothes I want you to wear…?”

“Yeah, yeah! I’m in suuuch a good mood right now, so if we stop by the boutique up ahead, I might even wear it for you.”

Because she’s in a good mood, she’ll do anything… gulp.

Hearing that, my gaze immediately snaps to Yuria’s chest and thighs.

Yeah… there’s only “one” answer, isn’t there…

“Then… no holding back.”

“Huh? O-okay.”

 

“Me, I guess… a micro bikini.”

 

“…Huh?”

Yuria muttered, her eyes wide.

“No, no, no! That’s not what we’re talking about right now! That makes zero sense!?”

“When thinking of clothes I want Yuria to wear, no matter who tallies it, has micro bikini at number one. And number two is a cow-print micro bikini.”

“That doesn’t make sense! And what is with you pushing micro bikinis this aggressively!? We’re talking about clothes and you jump straight to swimsuits—like, you’re off the rails!”

“I’m not off the rails!”

“You are off the rails!”

“Hey, you two! I saw you by chance and came over, and what’s with fighting in the middle of the street!?”

“”—! Y-you!?””

Right as Yuria and I were fighting (flirting), that voice suddenly came from behind us.

That voice—somehow childish, with a muddy sort of tone…

“”T-Tanaka!?””

“Hehe~ I saw something that looked like Ryouta-kun’s silhouette of a mega-pervert, and the aura of a beautiful gyaru, so I came over… but I never imagined you’d be fighting together, wow~”

Tanaka chuckled and muttered it like that.

Tanaka was wearing a sleeveless pure-white shirt, denim overalls, and a pink shoulder pouch—petite Tanaka’s almost ch●kawa fashion.

As always, Tanaka is the only one who makes me remember I’m living in a normal world.

“Heh… my thanks, Tanaka.”

“I don’t care about Ryouta-kun’s gratitude at all, so I’d like to know what you two were doing.”

“W-well, uh… we were, like, you know, stuff? Ryouta said he wanted to train his fashion sense, so I’m reluctantly teaching him, kinda.”

Yuria spoke while keeping the cosplay photoshoot under wraps, making it sound like she’s only going along with me because she has to.

Well, if we told Tanaka not just that Yuria’s an otaku, but that we were both cosplaying and taking pictures… that would be a disaster.

“Y-yeah, that’s right! I had Yuria pick my outfit today, see? It’s slick, right?”

“Mmm… compared to your usual self, Ryouta-kun, you do look weirdly stylish. Though? If you ask me, it still feels way too restrained. You’d have to wrap silver around your arms and stuff.”

“I’m not wrapping anything! Since when did you become a duelist (another me)?”

You’re more like the Insector type, if anything.

[Note: Insector Haga (also known as Weevil Underwood in the English dub of Yu‑Gi‑Oh!), a duelist who specializes in insect‑type cards.]

“Anyway, why are you here, Tanaka? Shopping or something?”

“Yes. I came to buy the thick BL novel that came out today and the thick fujoshi manga that came out today.”

“They’re both BL. And your house isn’t even in this direction, Tanaka—did you come all the way to the shopping mall just to buy BL?”

“Well, yes. There’s a bus stop in front of my house, so I often take the bus here. This shopping mall also has an anime specialty shop.”

Saying that, Tanaka pointed at the Animate sign farther back on that floor.

So Tanaka’s real goal was going to Animate.

“More importantly, Ryouta-kun, you had Ichinose-san pick your clothes, right? It sounded like you were arguing—what happened?”

“Huh? Oh, that was because I told Yuria about micro—”

At that moment, Yuria tugged on my sleeve with a quick tug.

The look on her face was sharp, like it was saying, Don’t say anything unecessary.

“More importantly! We’re actually going to buy ingredients at the CocoSco next door after this and do a barbecue at my place—Tanaka, wanna come too?”

“Huh? A barbecue? Doing something popular kid like that, is it really okay for someone like me to join?”

“Someone like you… obviously it’s fine. You’re our friend too, Tanaka. Besides, if I’m alone with Ryouta he’ll sexually harass me, so I was looking for someone anyway~”

Saying that, Yuria gave me a grin.

Y-Yuria… making things up…!!

M-me!? S-sexual harassment!? When have I ever!?

“So, Tanaka, you wanna come with us?”

“Um, okay! It really would be hard to be alone with a filthy-pervy introvert sexual-harasser like Ryouta-kun! Then I’ll gratefully participate!”

“You two sure are saying whatever you want.”

“Ryouta-kun, you can’t complain when your daily conduct is that bad.”

I didn’t even have a sound to make in response.

 

☆☆

 

For some reason, Tanaka ended up joining us, so the three of us would be acting together.

Damn it. If I hadn’t run into Tanaka, I could’ve enjoyed a filthy-pervy huge-thigh barbecue alone with Yuria (aka DDBBQ)… what a tragedy.

Still, meeting up and hanging out with Tanaka like this during summer vacation is the first time since the pool the other day, and if you go further back, it’s the first time since third year of middle school two years ago.

Thinking about the 【one-year blank】 that happened between me and Tanaka, I can’t tell whether being able to return to a relationship where we hang out like this is something to be grateful for… or a disaster.

“Ryouta-kun? What’s wrong—why are you staring at me with pervy eyes?”

“Who’s staring at you with pervy eyes. It’s a white-eyed stare—that’s what it is.”

“H-hey! What do you mean by that!?”

“Alright, alright, you two fight really easily. Anyway— I was thinking we’d go to CocoSco right away, but before that… Tanaka, did you already accomplish what you came here to do?”

“My goal? Oh, you mean Animate. Not yet, but… BL books won’t run away, so I can do it another day.”

As Tanaka tried to say it modestly, Yuria suddenly leaned forward and grabbed Tanaka’s shoulder.

“T-then let’s go there first, Tanaka! It’d be bad to drag you around for our errands too!”

“Huh? But Animate is kind of—”

Yuria… how badly do you want to go to Animate?

Now that Tanaka found us, we have to avoid exposing Yuria’s otaku side, and yet desire-faithful Yuria is using Tanaka’s goal as an excuse to try going to Animate.

I get it—Animate is an otaku’s heaven, and the urge to go is real… but the odds are even higher that she might expose her otaku side.

“Hold up.”

“R-Ryouta?”

“If Tanaka buys BL books at Animate, she’ll want to go read them and DDBBQ will be the last thing on her mind, so Animate is off-limits.”

“Well, I can’t deny that… but what is DDBBQ?”

“Crap… a-anyway! Animate is a no. Got it?”

“O-okay, I get it. Then we’re going to CocoSco now.”

I get why Yuria wants to go, but right now the risk is definitely too high.

Yuria told me before that going into Animate alone is kind of a hurdle for her, so maybe she thought that now that she has me and Tanaka with her, it’s the perfect time to go in… but she’s going to have to hold back.

But still… it’s one thing when it’s just me and her, but to scheme something this bold while Tanaka’s here… could it be that, for Yuria, she wants to tell Tanaka—someone who understands otaku culture—that she’s an otaku herself…?

“Hey… sorry about earlier, Ryouta.”

As we decided to head to CocoSco, with Tanaka walking in front and us walking behind, Yuria whispered softly into my ear.

“Sorry?”

“I can’t ever go into Animate alone, so I wanted to see the Animate in this mall so badly that I thought about using Tanaka’s goal as an excuse to go. I’m seriously sorry.”

“Ah… I see.”

Looks like her curiosity just got the better of her.

Yuria’s always acting like I’m some guy with my libido hanging out, but honestly, Yuria’s no saint either.

“It’s just Animate—I’ll go with you whenever you want. So hold off for now, okay?”

“Huh… y-yeah. You’re right. I’ve always… got you, Ryouta.”

As she said that, Yuria lightly rested her shoulder against mine—h-hey, hey! W-w-wait—i-is she doing that on purpose!?

“Oh, by the way, you’re not inviting Airi-tan?”

The moment Tanaka asked over her shoulder, Yuria quietly moved away from me.

“A-Airi is, like, busy, apparently! She came over this morning but she already left.”

“Heeeeh.”

What was that just now…?

My heart (and lower-half) wouldn’t stop thumping.

 

☆☆

 

We moved over to CocoSco next to the large shopping mall and went inside, pushing a ridiculously huge cart.

“This is my first time pushing a cart this huge.”

“Really? I don’t think it’s that huge.”

“No, it’s huge! If a normal supermarket cart is Tanaka’s thighs, then a CocoSco cart is Yuria’s.”

“H-hey! What kind of comparison is that!? L-look, my thighs are properly big too!”

“…………”

“Say something!!”

When I ignored her, Tanaka lost her temper and started smacking my back—pow-pow—while I pushed the cart.

Yeah… once you’ve seen Yuria’s thighs, sigh.

These are thighs that make you want to cling on in a way that doesn’t even compare to Tanaka’s.

“Tanaka, you don’t have to get so mad. Even if thighs are big, all that does is make Ryouta happy. Back in middle school I even had a phase where I tried to lose weight. And thin looks better proportion-wise and makes fashion easier to pull off, so it’s better. Definitely.”

“W-what is that, Ichinose-san!? Winner’s smugness!? I-if we’re talking academic ability, I’m the super-genius ranked second in the grade! Don’t get cocky just because you win on thighs!”

“I’m not trying to… hey, Ryouta, is Tanaka always like this?”

“Yeah. Tanaka’s basically ‘thorny-thorny’ by default, so her snapping is an everyday occurrence. You should get used to it.”

Yeah… Tanaka not having friends isn’t just because she’s reserved around everyone but me—this constant vibe is probably part of it too.

Well, if I buy her something she wants, her mood will probably improve.

“Tanaka, I’ll buy you something you like, so calm down.”

“Hmph… aren’t you treating me like a child again?”

“I’m not.”

“Then… I want that biiiiig bear!”

“Huh? A bear?”

Wondering what she meant, I looked in the direction Tanaka was pointing, and there it was…

“T-that’s way too big…”

A bear plushie with a completely insane sense of scale.

A gigantic bear plushie big enough it could probably wrap me up… w-what is this (what is this).

“I want you to buy it because I want to hug this bear and sleep with it.”

“At that size it’s not you hugging it, it’s it hugging you… and that biggest one is over twenty thousand yen!”

“Buy it! You’re the one who said you’d buy me something I like, Ryouta-kun!”

“There’s a limit to everything! Just go for a small one.”

“Ah. So you will buy one, then.”

I put the small bear—like a thousand yen—into the stupidly huge cart.

“Sorry, Yuria. I’ll pay for this separately—mind if I put it in the cart?”

“H-huh? Y-yeah.”

“Wow, you really do get results if you just try asking. Since we’re at it, I’ll name this one ‘Ryouta.’”

“Stop, that’s gross. More importantly, hurry up and let’s buy ingredients for DDBBQ—”

“Ah, um.”

Right as we were about to leave the plushie shelf, Yuria called out to stop us.

“Hm? What is it, Yuria?”

“I-I also… um… I want you to give me that bear plushie as a present, Ryouta.”

“You too, Yuria? You want this?”

“Y-yeah…”

With a hint of shyness on her face, Yuria pressed her lips together tight as she answered.

That’s… unexpected.

Sure, Yuria’s room has plushies and stuff, but she could come buy CocoSco plushies anytime, and I feel like the plushies in her room were cuter… but if she says she wants it, then.

“Of course! Actually, let me buy it—call it a thank-you for today too.”

“Really? It’s okay?”

“Yeah! Tanaka’s is brown, but what color do you want, Yuria?”

“I-I’ll… then maybe pink! Ah, but purple might work too!”

Yuria’s face brightened, and she started picking bears with childlike excitement.

Did she really want a bear plushie that badly?

If that’s the case, I could wear a bear costume and stay in Yuria’s room twenty-four seven…

Even while I felt jealous of a bear that could stare at Yuria’s private life all it wanted, I put the pink bear Yuria ultimately chose into the cart.

“Hey, Ryouta-kun, aren’t you treating me totally differently? You should’ve bought my plushie as enthusiastically as you’re buying Ichinose-san’s!”

“What’s your problem, Tanaka? If you’ve got complaints, I won’t buy it.”

“Ah! I’m sorry! No complaints! None!”

Tanaka keeps saying unnecessary things nonstop.

Seriously… this girl.

“Heh. Tanaka, are you jealous?”

“I-I’m not jealous or anything! Ichinose-san, you’re the one who suddenly wants a plushie—aren’t you jealous of me?”

“H-hah!? I-I’m not jealous! I just happened to be thinking I wanted one too!”

I don’t get it, but both of them were flustered and arguing.

 

☆☆

 

After that, the shopping at CocoSco continued, and since Tanaka and I are basically BBQ novices, we left almost everything about ingredients up to Yuria, but…

“Well, this much should be enough.”

When I looked into the cart, at some point an absurd amount of meat and seafood had piled up inside.

What is this volume… even a single CocoSco pack is already ridiculously large, and those were stacked all over the cart.

“How much are you buying…”

After paying and finishing our CocoSco shopping, we returned to Yuria’s house with bulging shopping bags in both hands.

“Waaah… Ichinose-san’s house is so big. In Ryouta-kun terms, it’s like the size of her thighs.”

“Don’t say it in Ryouta terms. That’s seriously gross.”

“Hah!? What’s that supposed to mean, Yuria!? That makes it sound like I’m gross!”

“”Because you are (that’s why).””

Damn… y-you two… that’s so direct.

And to think they don’t even know I’d enjoy being insulted… pathetic.

“Man, the house is big, but the garden’s really pretty too.”

As Tanaka looked around the garden, Yuria’s pet dog came charging toward Tanaka, snorting hard.

“H-hey! Ryouta-kun, Ichinose-san! A huge dog is running this way—gboah! H-hey, stop! My face—! Don’t lick me!”

The dog tackled Tanaka at full force, knocking her down onto the lawn.

To think she’d even get licked by a dog too…

“Hey, hey, Tanaka, don’t frolic—help with BBQ prep.”

“How do you look at this situation and think I’m playing around!? Help me!”

While Tanaka “frolicked” with the dog, Yuria and I started prepping for the BBQ in the yard.

“H-hey! Why are you two ignoring me in this situation!? D-don’t abandon—GYAAAH!!”

Yuria and I calmly continued preparations—pulling out a big BBQ grill from the shed, setting up outdoor chairs and a table.

We still have to light the fire and stuff too—BBQs have a surprisingly long checklist of mundane tasks.

“So stop ignoring me and help—w-wait, puppy, n-not there, please… kya♡”

But even that boring work flew by in a blink if I did it while looking at Yuria’s thighs as we prepped together.

“Ryouta, you’ve been weirdly quiet while we prep… don’t tell me you’re staring at my thighs again? You really don’t get tired of it, huh.”

“…Time flies like an arrow; huge thighs are ever thick.”

“Yeah, I have no idea what you’re saying, but I do know one thing: you’re as gross as ever.”

Yuria prepped the grill with an exasperated look, and as I waited for the fire to catch next to her, I looked down at Yuria’s thighs.

“But, y’know, it’s probably a good thing you don’t get tired of me. ‘Cause I think we’re gonna be… in it for the long haul, right?”

“L-long haul? Yeah. If we stay in the same academic track, we’ll probably be in the same class again next year.”

“N-no, that’s not what I meant, like…”

Frowning, Yuria denied it.

“Well… whatever. It’s the same wither way. Anyways, Ryouta—if you’re next to me next year too… that’s all I need.”

“Next to you? Oh, you mean seats. Our student numbers are close, so there’s a decent chance we’ll start off with seats near each other again next year—”

“You idiottt… agh! Seriously! Do you want your face grilled by the BBQ?!”

Yuria clicked the tongs in her hand with an extremely pissed expression.

“W-why are you mad, Yuria!? Because I was looking at your thighs!?”

“The thighs are fine right now!”

“Wait, the thighs are fine?”

So yeah, I kept watching her thighs while we waited for the meat to cook.

“The meat should start cooking little by little, so let’s do the rest of the prep too. Heeey, Tanaka—stop playing around and watch the meat.”

“I’m not playing! Just help me already!”

Tanaka, who’d been stuck under the dog in a mount position ever since we got here, was finally rescued by Yuria.

“I-I’ll never forgive that huge stupid dog.”

A sixteen-year-old (fujoshi) threatening a dog.

Man… this is exactly why Tanaka is…

“Okay, Tanaka and Ryouta, you grill the meat. I’ll cut vegetables in the kitchen.”

“Yeah, thanks, Yuria.”

“Mm. Tell me if the fire goes out.”

Saying that, Yuria went inside the house.

“Hey, Ryouta-kun—what’s with that disappointed face!? You’ve got the face of someone who can’t get motivated unless he’s staring at thighs.”

“You… how do you know. Are you a genius?”

“I have never been less happy to be praised as a genius in my life. Seriously.”

With a face like she’d bitten down on something bitter, Tanaka looked after the meat.

“But, like… talking with you alone like this, Ryouta-kun—it’s been a while, hasn’t it. Lately the beauty trio have been around too, and even spending summer vacation together… it’s been since middle school, or something.”

“Yeah… that might be true.”

Thinking back, it really has been two years since I spent summer vacation like this with Tanaka.

“Last year was kind of our one-year blank, I guess—after we became friends, it was the first time we ended up in different classes, so it felt… weird.”

“Yeah… it did.”

We’d never really talked about it, but an oddly delicate distance had definitely formed between us.

“Honestly… I was a little scared to talk to you. Back when we were in the same class all through middle school, we could always see how each other were doing in class, so it was easier to approach you, I guess. But when we ended up in different classes for the first time, and we only ran into each other occasionally… I was worried that one day, Ryouta-kun would become a Ryouta-kun I didn’t know anymore.”

“T-Tanaka…”

“But it was pointless worry. You’re still the same hopelessly filthy-pervy, otaku, pervert as ever!”

“Hey! That’s an insult, isn’t it!?”

“Yes, it is!”

“You—!”

“But… because that Ryouta-kun is the precious person to me called Izumiya Ryouta. That’s fine, isn’t it, Ryouta-kun?”

Tanaka flipped over the cooked meat and said it with a smile.

The me I am now… the precious me in Tanaka’s eyes.

“M-me too… I’m relieved you haven’t changed either, Tanaka. You’re… my one and only best friend.”

Maybe because Tanaka said something uncharacteristically earnest, I ended up letting a little of my honest feelings slip out too.

But it’s true—I was relieved Tanaka hasn’t changed.

“Ryouta-kun… m-mouu! Don’t say gross things with that face!”

“Hah? Then forget it! I take it back!!”

“H-hey, are you two fighting again?”

Yuria came back holding a salad bowl.

“Ichinose-saaaan, listen! Ryouta-kun apparently loves me sooo much~”

“Huh? Hey, Ryouta, is that for real?”

“W-why are you blowing up, Yuria!? It’s a misunderstanding! I was just trying to express gratitude to this one—”

Because of Tanaka, this wasn’t even about BBQ anymore.

Once the DDBBQ prep was done, we finally got to eat.

Meat and vegetables grilled properly on the grill.

It’s been ages since I’ve eaten beef this thick, and the summer vegetables skewered between the meat look vivid too, making my appetite surge.

As the fat drips down, an even more fragrant smell spreads—

“Ryouta-kun! How long are you going to do that annoying gourmet-manga-character internal monologue!?”

“Don’t get in my way, Tanaka. Right now, I’m having a conversation with the meat.”

“I don’t care about that! Stop standing like a statue in front of the meat forever and move!”

Interrupted by Tanaka, my conversation with the meat was cut off.

Seriously. This is Tanaka for you when she’s hungry.

Pushed aside by Tanaka, I headed over to Yuria, who was bringing plates to the table.

“Yuriaaa! Tanaka’s getting in my way!”

“Haaah… you two aren’t kids. You fight so easily.”

With an exasperated look, Yuria handed me a plate.

“Alright, go get meat for my portion too. The tasty parts, please.”

“The tasty parts…?”

My gaze instantly dropped downward.

When you say “tasty parts,” you mean… right? (Scumbag face.)

“Don’t look at my thighs right there!”

“B-but—”

“Besides, you haven’t even eaten it yet.”

“Yet?”

“Hey, you two! Hurry up and eat alreadyyy!”

Tanaka called to us while aggressively stuffing meat into her cheeks.

“Yeah, yeah. C’mon, Ryouta, let’s go.”

“O-oh.”

“Nnhooo! I can feel all the cells in my body getting activated!”

“Like hell you can. It’s not like you’re absorbing gourmet cells or anything.”

Tanaka did look like she was glowing a little, but that’s probably my imagination.

“Man, anyway, summer vacation is almost over, isn’t it. If only summer vacation this delicious could go on endlessly.”

“You’re shameless. Though yeah—if that pool thing could go on endlessly, it’d be the best.”

“H-hey, Ryouta, that’s—”

I turned a gaze that could lick to Yuria.

If I could endlessly relive that “thing” where I tasted Yuria’s cherry on my back, I feel like I could endure even 15,521 repeats.

“What ‘thing’ are you talking about?”

“Nothing. It’s got nothing to do with a child like you, Tanaka.”

“Huh? Did you do something suuuper lewd!? Hey!”

Savoring luxurious meat and the lowest dirty jokes while BBQing…

That time felt special.

If only this time could last forever…

Thinking that, I chewed into the meat again.

And so, our lively summer vacation came to an end.