Chapter 1: My Relationship with That Person

The upper floor of our two-family house was originally Grandpa’s living space, but now it’s become a secret base for me and my little sister—or at least it was supposed to be. Yet here in my room, a beautiful girl who isn’t even family is happily playing a game.

“Ah! Enemies are coming this way!”

The voice I hear from outside the headset belongs to an adorably pitiful girl. Since she’s right next to me, I can hear it directly.

In the room, there are two desks, two chairs, two computers, and two displays. I’m sitting in one chair. A high school girl is sitting in the other.

In this enclosed space, my skin feels her body heat. Or maybe that’s just my imagination.

“I’m heading over there now.”

I—Kuroki You—am supposed to be bad with the opposite sex, yet I’m responding like it’s the most natural thing. No hesitation, the words just flow out smoothly.

“Hurry up, hurry!”

“I got it, calm down.”

I don’t have many friends at school, and my gaming circle is just as sparse. I’m an introverted gamer through and through, so what’s happening here? In my own room, I’m playing a shooter game with a classmate—a girl, no less.

Every time her hand flicks the mouse toward me, even without contact, a ticklish shiver runs through me.

“They’re coming this way, over here, over here!”

“I got it, just settle down.”

The game we’re playing is a shooter where the goal is to survive by taking out enemies on a deserted island. When playing with teammates, voice chat is usually the way to go.

But since we’re side by side in my room right now, there’s no need for that. Her voice comes straight from beside me, carrying its warmth. No lag at all.

“Wah! I’m dead!”

Her voice, brimming with emotion, overpowers the game’s sound effects. That’s how absorbed she is.

“Hang on a sec. Once I take this guy down, I’ll come revive you right away.”

“So cool! Do your best!”

So cool, do your best—my heart skips a beat, and for a split second, my hands fumble the controls. Don’t say stuff that could make me shoot my teammate in the back. My resistance to charm is trash-tier.

“…Alright, got him. On my way to help.”

“Yay! Thanks! I love you!”

“…!?”

Calm down, I tell myself. It’s just casual banter, nothing more. A throwaway line, standard gamer talk.

The girl launching that deadly heart-stopping attack is my classmate, sitting close enough to shake my composure with every word.

Her name is Toudou Mashiro.

Her ash-blonde hair, a natural cascade, frames a figure so perfectly proportioned it’s almost unreal—nine heads tall, as if sculpted for the spotlight. Her skin glows pale, her lips a delicate pink. The foreign flair of her hair contrasts with her distinctly Japanese features, and her clear blue eyes, usually hidden behind black contacts, are a secret shared only with a trusted few.

She’s a model, an actress, and an influencer with over 300,000 followers across her socials. “I’m not that active, so I don’t stand out much,” Toudou claims, but to a guy like me, whose whole world revolves around gaming, she’s practically a mythical creature.

A high school girl from an entirely different universe, playing games with an utterly unremarkable classmate like me. Toudou Mashiro, who orbits the vibrant, outgoing crowd, feels impossibly out of place in this setup.

Back in middle school, I was a starry-eyed kid dreaming of going pro, only to crash into the harsh wall of reality and my own limits. Now I’m just a high schooler gaming for fun. Once, I chased strength; now, I’m content as long as it’s enjoyable. What sparked that shift? Was it my own doing, or did Toudou Mashiro reshape me somehow…?

Before I realize it, the results screen flashes on the display.

You are the Champion

The victory message glows. I must’ve been lost in thought, but somehow, I pulled through.

Beside me, Toudou slips off her headset. “See? I always win when I play with you, Kuroki-kun. You’re amazing.”

Her ash-blonde hair sways softly, carrying a sweet scent that brushes my senses. I inhale reflexively, then feel a pang of guilt, brushing it off like it’s nothing.

“There are tons of people way better than me,” I mutter, stating the plain truth.

Toudou shakes her head, undeterred. “You think so? To me, you’re the most reliable, Kuroki-kun. Playing next to you feels… secure, on a whole different level. Doesn’t that make you strong? At least to me, you’re the ultimate teammate.”

Her smile, unbearably cute, forces me to avert my gaze.

“The most…?” I mumble. “Compared to who? It’s not like you play with anyone else.”

Toudou Mashiro has her reasons for only gaming here, at my place. But her next words caught me off guard.

“Oh, actually, I played with some people from the agency the other day. I mentioned at the office that I like games, and they invited me out of the blue. Just a few matches. You know how they set up that streaming team with all the fancy equipment? It was me and two others, using that setup.”

“…Huh.”

A faint sting pricks my chest, but I shove it down, pretending it’s nothing.

Toudou catches something in my tone and flashes a mischievous grin. “By the way, it was a guy one year older and another my age.”

“…Oh, yeah. Two guys, one girl. Got it.”

Agency. Models. Showbiz. A trio of two guys and one girl—sounds like a scene from a world I’ll never touch.

Yet the Toudou right here, in this cramped room, in my world, smiles just for me.

“Hehe.”

“What…?”

“‘What,’ he says. You were jealous just now, weren’t you, Kuroki-kun?”

“I’m not.”

“Really?”

“Worried someone might steal your Mashiro-chan away? It’s fine, it’s fine, no one’s taking me. You’re so cute~ Come here, you.”

A few playful elbow nudges jab at me from her side. They don’t hurt, but their warmth seeps into me.

“As if. Don’t say stupid stuff.”

“You sure? Hee hee.”

“Cut it out already.”

I huff in exasperation, and suddenly, Toudou’s expression shifts to something serious.

“Hey, Kuroki-kun…?”

My stomach drops. Did I cross a line? I lost track of our boundaries for a second.

Toudou places a hand on her chin, like a detective puzzling over a case, and opens her mouth.

“I just realized… Doesn’t ‘hee hee’ sound like ‘meow meow’…?”

What in the world does that even mean?

“I still can’t keep up with your conversation flow sometimes…” I mutter, hoping I didn’t say anything wrong.

Toudou’s expression shifts, a flicker of genuine irritation crossing her face. “Don’t call me ‘you.’ Call me ‘Mashiro-chan’ or ‘Maa-chan.’”

“I don’t get your logic, Toudou-san.”

“Toudou-san?”

“…Toudou Mashiro-san.”

“Hmm?”

Her glare pins me, and I falter under pressure. “Mashiro…-san.”

My face flushes hot, the embarrassment overwhelming.

“Hehe, alright, that’ll do,” Toudou says, nodding with an ‘uh-huh, uh-huh’ of satisfaction. Then, like flipping a switch, she shifts gears, fiddling with her phone. Her moods change like pages in a flipbook.

“Speaking of cats, that reminds me. The other day, for a Halloween shoot, I wore cat ears with a headband. You know, maid outfit with cat ears. Wanna see? I’m not supposed to show it yet, though.”

“If you’re not supposed to show it, then don’t…”

Truthfully, I’m dying to see. But before my curiosity betrays me, I decide to escape. “I’m gonna grab some drinks. Want anything, Toudou?”

“Oh, really? Yeah, maybe.”

“Is that slightly carbonated one you said was tasty last time good?”

Toudou tilts her head, puzzled. “You still have that? I thought it was seasonal.”

“There’s a little left.”

Because you looked so happy when you said it was tasty, I stocked up on every last bottle before it sold out. But admitting that would only inflate her ego, so I keep it to myself.

“Then yeah, that one. Thanks, Kuroki-kun.”

Suddenly, she flashes a mature smile, a stark contrast to her playful antics moments ago. It’s hard to believe it’s the same person.

Why is it I can talk so easily during games, but now… Her crystal-clear smile seems to see right through me, leaving me flustered. My heart races, and no amount of playing it cool can hide it. It’s not my immaturity—it’s that smile.

“…Alright, wait a sec.”

“Okaay, hurry back~!” The mature girl vanishes, replaced by a carefree high schooler waving both hands as if sending me off.

She shifts way too fast; I’m breathless. Instead of giving in, I stand and bolt for the door like I’m fleeing.

My hand grips the doorknob when an unexpected voice stops me.

“Hey, Kuroki-kun.”

“Huh, what’s up?”

Caught off guard, I turn, still clutching the knob, my face blank.

Toudou swivels her chair to face me, her expression deadly serious. “Honestly, though. Me coming over to your room to play games… is it actually a bother?”

“What? Why’re you asking that all of a sudden?”

My tone sharpens—not out of anger, but from a sudden dread, like I’m about to drop something fragile and irreplaceable.

“There’s no specific reason, but still. I go out of my way to disguise myself just to come play. Anyone would think it’s a hassle. Plus, what if some tabloid snaps a photo and it spreads online? That could cause you a ton of stress.”

“I’ve never thought of it as a bother. Not even once.”

I emphasized “not even once,” every word ringing with truth.

But her unease lingers. Toudou’s lips purse slightly, a faint shadow of doubt in her eyes.

“Don’t you get tired playing games with me? I’m so weak, and you always end up stuck as the support role.”

“Even if you’re weak… as long as it’s fun, that’s what matters. That’s how games should be.”

The words slip out, and a moment later, I’m stunned. Even if you’re weak, it’s fine? As long as it’s fun? Me, who used to play only to win—am I really saying this?

“R-right! Even if I’m weak, as long as it’s fun, that’s good!” Toudou echoes, her voice bright.

“Yeah, exactly,” I nod, half-convincing myself.

“So, that means you think playing games with me is fun, right?”

Her question catches me off guard, and I falter, but denying it now would ruin everything. I summon my courage. “Yeah. Playing games with you, Toudou, is fun.”

In that instant, Toudou’s face lights up with a childlike joy, eyes wide, mouth half-open—like a kid unwrapping a gift from Santa himself. “I have fun too! I’m really glad you’re here, Kuroki-kun!”

She leans forward with such enthusiasm I think she might vault out of her chair, and I shrink back under the intensity. “W-well, that’s good then.”

My emotions churn, a tangled mess. Her words spark happiness, but my face refuses to form a genuine smile. I’m terrible at being honest.

“Yeah, it is! Let’s hurry up and play!” Toudou’s smile is effortless, and radiant. She strikes a playful fighting pose, fists raised near her chest. It’s probably meant to mimic a boxer, but it only accentuates her figure, the neckline of her thin shirt dipping to reveal more than she realizes.

Faced with this oblivious temptation, words escape me.

“…Alright, I’ll go grab the drinks for real this time. We can game after that.”

“Okay! I’ll be useful next time!” Her pose tightens, drawing even more attention to her chest.

“……”

“What’s wrong?”

Her head tilts, innocent yet dangerously misleading. Toudou can be selfish, suddenly childish, or let her guard down in the oddest ways.

“…No, it’s nothing. I’ll be right back.”

“Okaaay, see you soon.”

She waves bye-bye with both hands as I turn, stepping out and easing the door shut behind me. I take a slow, silent breath, careful not to let any sound carry back inside.

“…What is she, anyway?”

Toudou Mashiro. She doesn’t belong in my world. Our levels are leagues apart. In a reincarnation story, I’d be the guy who dies in the first chapter, while she’d be off saving the world.

So why does she keep burrowing into my heart like this? Someone who’s always adored, no matter what, smiling at a nobody like me—who’d be ignored even if I shouted.

And with such unguarded trust, like a puppy wagging its tail, bounding toward me with a beaming grin.

If this is what they call “youth,” it’s a series of events that could wreck my heart. It feels like it might stop any second.

“How did it come to this…?”

I’m not joking, seriously, how did it come to this?

I close my eyes, and memories flicker like a life flashing before me. The first moment, our initial meeting, plays out on the backs of my eyelids.

Back then—she and I weren’t friends.