──…This is taking forever. How long are they gonna keep talking?
Summer vacation—if you’ve been going to school like normal, you’ve gone through it at least nine times just in compulsory education alone, so there’s really nothing new to say about it at this point.
While half-listening to our homeroom teacher, Jushinin-sensei, I let my gaze wander aimlessly around the classroom for no particular reason, until it settled on the seat at the very front by the window.
It was Kaori, who had just moments ago talked about her transfer in front of everyone again.
Most of the classmates already knew about it since it’d been buzzing around for a while, so it was basically just a formality, but starting next semester, she won’t be coming to this classroom anymore.
Compared to how things have been, it’s easy to imagine it’ll get a whole lot quieter around here.
Even though this is her last time in this classroom, it’s impressive how she can sit there listening so seriously to this unbearably boring talk.
She’s not a bad teacher or anything, but it’s because she drags on like this about totally pointless stuff during times like these that people call her an old hag behind her back.
After about fifteen minutes, the talk finally wrapped up, and the student on duty called out the commands to end homeroom.
Watching my classmates all start moving at once out of the corner of my eye, like they’d been freed from some heavy burden, I let out a quiet sigh.
“Himura-kun, you seem kinda worn out lately?”
“Hm, well… A bit of everything, I guess.”
The reason I’m tired is because of all the festival prep stuff I’ve been handling.
It’s all because the relatives from Nanami-san’s… from Kaori’s side suddenly pulled out en masse, leaving us short on young male help, so whenever something comes up, the arrow points straight at me.
Back when I was little, it was called the “youth group,” but now it’s this preservation society made up of middle-aged folks and older, all dealing with hernias, slipped discs, water on the knee, or some other bodily time bomb, so it can’t be helped.
I let out another sigh and looked up, only to catch sight of students from other classes flooding into the room.
“Whoa, what’s with all the commotion…?”
“It’s for Kaori’s farewell party, duh.”
“Farewell party? They should’ve done that during summer break…”
I muttered that under my breath without thinking, and for some reason, Kiritsuki gave me a double-take.
“Huh?”
“?”
“…Wait, Himura-kun…”
“What?”
“Um… huh?”
“──…”
Hold on a second.
Give me a moment to think.
Word about Kaori moving and transferring schools had spread through the school right away. That was before July even started.
Now it’s late July, more than half a month later, so it wouldn’t be weird at all if talks about a farewell party and preparations for it had been going on.
So then, why didn’t I know about it until just now?
Obviously, because it was the first I’d heard of it.
And if it was the first I’d heard, that means I hadn’t been invited to the farewell party.
Pretty much every day after school, I’d bolt out of the classroom right away to study for tests with Tomo or head to the community center, so maybe it couldn’t be helped…
No, someone should’ve just messaged me like normal.
“…We made a secret group chat to surprise Kaori, remember? You didn’t check it?”
A chill… like ice running down my spine. An incredibly unpleasant sensation shot through my body.
“…Hold up, what’re you talking about…? And why surprise her anyway? What if she had plans?”
“I checked with her for days she was free and slotted it in there, so it’s fine. That’s why it ended up being on the day of the closing ceremony.”
“Ah… right.”
────Maybe I should just head home.
Probably, no one meant anything by it.
It’s different from back then when everyone intentionally ignored me—I’m sure this was just a coincidence.
…That said, I can’t help but overlap it with the past in my mind.
“Eh, wait? …Himura, you?”
Pushing Kiritsuki’s confused voice from behind me out of my mind, I left the classroom.
In the hallway, noisy footsteps echoed from behind. I had no idea who was making the racket or where they were from, and I didn’t care, but it was probably related to Kaori too.
When I stepped out of the school building, there were surprisingly few people in the courtyard by the main gate.
Feeling a slight unease at my childhood friend’s influence once again, I passed through the school gate and started on the path home.
It’s been a while since my own emotional weakness made me feel this pathetic.
I could’ve just made up some excuse to join in or casually tag along.
Even though I thought I’d properly talked things out with Kaori, it seems the feelings smoldering in my chest hadn’t completely vanished.
I hate cliquey groups to an extreme, yet getting left out of something as simple as a farewell gathering managed to break my spirit—I didn’t see that coming, even from myself.
Somehow, it felt like I couldn’t handle this weird ache in my heart anymore.
I stopped by a nearby park, settled onto a bench, and called Toki.
I figured I’d vent a little and have her listen, but…
“…She’s not picking up.”
Why is it that she won’t let me lean on her exactly when I need it? She’s always clinging all over me when it doesn’t matter.
…I’m seriously hopeless.
It’s only natural for humans to have contradictory feelings sometimes, and I’ve known all too well for ages how weak my own heart is. It’s not like I’m gonna start caring about that now.
Still, even if no one intended it, falling into the same situation as when I was being bullied makes me feel like some invisible hand is squeezing my heart hard, causing this intense pain.
“…Can’t be helped, right?”
I muttered it like a spell without thinking.
Once you’ve felt a pain like that, it can come rushing back any number of times, even in unintended ways.
Anyway, once Kaori’s gone from my side soon, the chances to remember it will probably decrease.
Under the clear blue sky, I looked up at the sun blazing down harshly.
The park was empty of people, and it was so damn hot that not even the cicadas were chirping. Even the crows were quietly hunkered down in the shade.
The only one here was a total jerk who felt a sense of joy at the thought of his decade-plus childhood friend disappearing from his vicinity.
I thought I didn’t want her around, that I wanted her gone, but then when I’m not invited to her farewell party, it brings back memories of being bullied and I end up hurting myself over it—what a truly contradictory jerk.
At this rate, I might as well just—
“…I’m starting to feel like dying.”
“──Eh…?”
It was a completely unconscious mutter, so I never expected a response, and I hurriedly shifted my gaze to the park entrance where the voice came from.
Then, suddenly, Kiritsuki’s beautiful face filled my vision.
Had she run here in this heat?
Sweat was dripping from the bangs hanging over her nose, and her soaked shirt was translucent enough that her light blue underwear faintly showed through.
Her expression was somehow desperate as she grabbed my shoulders with both hands.
“Himura-kun, what did you just say!?”
She leaned in closer, a bit out of breath, and a drop of sweat fell onto my cheek too.
“…Nah, it was nothing. Just slipped out unconsciously.”
“Saying ‘I want to die’ unconsciously is pretty serious, you know?”
“W-Well, yeah…”
She was right that it hit me hard, but I didn’t want to lean on Kiritsuki over old stuff anymore, so I quickly changed the subject.
“More importantly, why are you here? What about the farewell party?”
“There’s no way I could just leave you alone after you left with that look on your face!!”
She must’ve hesitated a lot before coming. Maybe she was on her way to the venue and turned back halfway.
If not, with her speed, she would’ve caught up to me right away.
Kiritsuki furrowed her brows for just a moment,
“I told you before… I’ll listen to anything if it’s about you.”
She gently stroked my cheek with the hands that had been gripping my shoulders.
“Don’t put on a tough front in front of me. Seeing your jaded eyes makes me hurt too.”
Kiritsuki’s expression was dead serious.
Unable to hold her straight, unwavering gaze, I looked away without meaning to.
“Why are you so…”
I couldn’t think of how to finish that sentence, but Kiritsuki cut in and continued.
“──Because I like you. You get that, right?”
She said it without a hint of embarrassment, her face only growing more serious.
“I don’t get it…”
“Then today, I’ll stick with you until you do.”
With that and a smile, Kiritsuki sat down next to me.
She pulled a towel from her bag and started unbuttoning a few buttons on her shirt.
I averted my gaze at the sight and searched for words, but nothing came to mind.
In the end, what came out was the conversation I’d heard just before leaving the classroom.
“…What about Kaori?”
“I’ll message her properly later, and I can always do a farewell thing with her anytime.
“You sure? You went out of your way to make time for her.”
“If you asked me which is more important, I’d say you, Himura-kun. Kaori’ll be fine on her own, but you need me around.”
Being told that so definitively, all I could do was shrug.
I need Kiritsuki around, huh.
It’s true that just having her come to my side like this has calmed my heart down a lot.
“…You really do watch out for me, don’t you?”
“Of course, I’m always watching you.”
“Always… how long?”
I don’t even know why I asked that.
But Kiritsuki answered without hesitation.
“As long as you want me to, I guess.”
She smiled at me as she said it, and I couldn’t look at her face for too long.
Maybe the temperature was rising, because my face felt strangely hot.
