After urging me to hurriedly eat my bento, Kiritsuki dragged me to an empty, deserted classroom.
And then, she made this request of me.
“Please, just for a little while, could you pretend to be my fake boyfriend?”
I answered immediately.
“Absolutely, no way.”
No need to even think about it—who’d want to deal with something that troublesome?
“You’re saying it with such conviction, is it really that bad?”
“I’d rather die than do it.”
Picturing Kiritsuki dancing on a minefield in my head, I hopped up to sit on the edge of an empty locker.
“Don’t people usually ask for a reason or something?”
“Doesn’t matter, I’m not doing it.”
“Ugh, come on…”
“Go ask Tomiya or someone.”
He’d probably listen to her reasons, and depending on the situation, he might even agree.
If they spent enough time together, they might actually end up dating for real.
“I’m not close enough with him to ask something like this.”
“Huh? If you’re saying that, I’ve known you for even less time, haven’t I?”
“Yeah, but I feel like I can inconvenience you a bit more without feeling bad about it.”
Wait, is she mocking me or something? What’s with this ‘I can inconvenience you’ nonsense? I’m pretty sure Tomiya’s way more of a pushover than I am.
All I can hear is her basically saying, You look like you’ve got nothing better to do, so you’ve got time, right?
“I’d even go on dates with you, you know?”
“No thanks, I’m good.”
“Oh, right, of course you’re good. With such a cute childhood friend, I guess someone like me wouldn’t be enough for the oh-so-fortunate Himura-kun.”
“What’s that supposed to mean, ‘not enough’? It’s not like it matters whether it’s you or Kaori or anyone else.”
I wish someone, anyone, could stand in my shoes and feel what I feel, just once.
Then they’d never say I’m “fortunate” again.
Having a childhood friend who’s the same age, beautiful, charming, excels at academics and sports, polite, cheerful, kind to everyone, and insanely popular, always by your side.
And on top of that, she’s super attached to you.
But despite all that, have I ever once felt fortunate or happy about it?
Maybe, just maybe, when I was a little kid, still figuring out the world, I might’ve felt a fleeting moment of that.
At the very least, I don’t have any memory of it.
Because being around someone like her means constantly… unfairly… being compared to her, hearing things like, Why can’t you do better? or You’re not good enough for Kaori.
Just because our parents are close, and she happens to be attached to me—that’s it.
I’ve been hit with harsher words than that countless times. Criticized and belittled for reasons so unfair they’re beyond counting, like stars in the sky.
But there’s no reason to unload all that here.
I’m not trying to take it out on Kiritsuki, and there’s no reason to burden her with this story.
Still, to calm the messy emotions that started spilling out, I had to say at least this much.
“Besides, having a cute childhood friend is kind of a lot to deal with, you know? Getting judged and let down just for being Kaori’s childhood friend—it’s honestly pretty rough.”
“Huh…? Oh…”
Kiritsuki’s face twisted into a complicated expression.
After being around me for nearly a year, she must’ve picked up on something.
“Did I… step on a landmine or something?”
“Hmm, who knows?”
We just happened to grow up in nearby houses, our parents got along by chance, and before I knew it, she was attached to me.
For some reason, “childhood friend” sounds nice, but that’s all it is.
How many times in middle school did I almost beg Kaori, Please, never talk to me again?
When she told me we’d be going to the same high school, I was utterly devastated.
Even now, acting like a normal childhood friend stresses me out to no end.
The only reason I haven’t cut ties with Kaori is because my little sister, Kohaku, adores her.
Not that I’m some kind of siscon or anything.
Even though our parents have called me useless compared to Kaori over and over, or left Kohaku lonely because of their work despite choosing to adopt her, I’m still grateful to them for raising me, and I respect how hard they work day and night at their tough jobs.
Kaori was spoiled by her parents growing up, but thanks to her naturally good personality and knack for things, she turned out upright.
I, on the other hand, was raised strictly with Kaori as the benchmark, always feeling the gap between my family and hers while worrying about my sister and dealing with parents who were lenient with her.
I feel guilty toward Kohaku for being a pathetic brother who locks himself in his room when he’s not doing chores, always looking dead-eyed and unreliable.
If enduring a little keeps Kohaku from looking sad, I’ll keep being Kaori’s childhood friend, making sure she doesn’t hate me.
But seriously, what part of this situation could anyone call “fortunate”?
If having a childhood friend who’s good-looking, kind, and smart is supposed to be fortunate, then maybe it is.
But that ignores the mental and emotional toll it takes because of her presence.
If someone out there can look at all this and still say being Kaori’s childhood friend is “fortunate,” then I wish they could take my place.
At the very least, I can’t see it that way.
Being Kaori’s childhood friend leaves you with no allies. I can’t call that fortunate.
“…Anyway, enough about me. So, why are you asking me to do something this weird?”
“Himura-kun, I can’t tell if you’re trying to dodge the topic or just bringing it back around…”
It’s both.
“Well, I don’t want to step on any more landmines, so I’ll talk seriously now—”
After that, Kiritsuki explained the whole situation and how it came about.
It all started with a guy in our grade who confessed to Kaori a little while ago.
He’s from the next class over, and even though Kiritsuki told me his name, I had no clue who he was. Long story short, after Kaori rejected him, he started approaching Kiritsuki the very next day.
Apparently, he’s pretty good-looking.
At first, she didn’t think much of it since stuff like this happens, but then somehow a rumor started going around that she and this guy were dating.
I hadn’t heard anything about that rumor.
So, to clear up the misunderstanding and avoid any more stray shots coming her way through Kaori, she figured she’d ask me—someone she could inconvenience without feeling too guilty—to be her fake boyfriend.
“—And that’s the deal.”
“Nope, I’m out.”
“Seriously, after all that?! What was the point of me explaining?!”
“Look, I’m not exactly on your level, am I? If that guy’s good-looking, a rumor like that won’t just disappear easily, will it?”
“But if I skip club and go on an after-school date with a different guy, it’ll feel more legit, right?”
Is it just me, or does this sound vaguely familiar?
That aside, it kinda stings that she didn’t even try to deny the part about us not being on the same level.
“Don’t just casually assume you’re skipping club.”
“It’s fine, it’s not like anyone’s gonna yell at me.”
No, someone should—like the advisor or the club captain.
Apparently, since middle school, she’s been a long-distance runner, consistently pulling in great results.
I don’t care about track at all, so I only know her as a regular person, but it seems she’s got a lot of influence in the club. Meritocracy is terrifying.
Honestly, for something like this, she doesn’t even need a fake boyfriend.
For example, just being a little closer to some guy or acting a bit friendlier than usual can make people go, Huh, what’s that about?
“Listen, when it comes to misleading people, it’s all about words and actions.”
“Wait, what? Are we talking about how to scam people now?”
I know this from experience.
The most important thing is subtle closeness.
The most effective move is when someone who’s never done this before suddenly gets close to a guy at school in a way they wouldn’t normally, then shows a hint of embarrassment when they realize it.
And what happens then? Right—bullying starts.
When the perfect, kind-to-everyone girl accidentally shows a special side of herself, people assume she’s got a guy, and the jealous losers try desperately to tear her down.
In the end, they turn into hyenas swarming over carrion. And guess who the carrion is? Me.
I explained all this carefully, leaving out the part about being bullied.
“…Is that from personal experience?”
“Yeah.”
“Wow, you’ve been through a lot more than I thought…”
I have no idea how much she thought I’d been through, but one thing’s clear: she’s underestimating Kaori’s influence a bit.
And because of that, she’s also undervaluing herself in comparison.
“Anyway, I’m not doing this fake boyfriend nonsense. If you want to hang out after school or eat lunch together, just let me know in advance, and I can make it work. That should be enough, right?”
If she just casually says, Oh, I actually have a boyfriend, and it’s this guy, while pointing at me, people will just laugh it off.
“Hmm, well, if it’s not much different, I guess that’s fine… maybe?”
The tricky thing about her is that she’s somewhat aware of her own charm but undervalues it slightly.
I wonder when this beautiful girl will realize her true influence. As long as she’s staying best friends with Kaori, it probably won’t happen.
All I could do was let out a quiet sigh as I watched Kiritsuki ponder with her hand on her chin.
☆Afterword──────────────────
※Note: This story contains slight depictions of gloom. Just a tiny bit, very slight, barely noticeable.
It’s not the kind of warning you’d put in an afterword, but there’ll be a bit more of this vibe in the future.
That said, it’s got a real rom-com feel, doesn’t it? Especially with the fake boyfriend thing. But of course, Himura-kun shuts it down.
Also, huge thanks for reaching ☆700!
This makes it my most highly rated work, and I’m truly grateful to all my readers.
