Annoying

Realizing that the flashback arc doesn’t seem anywhere close to ending, I had an epiphany.

Wouldn’t it be more interesting to drag it out bit by bit?

So, for now, the flashback arc is over!!!

Opening my eyes, I let out a single sigh. I’d gotten lost in some pretty old memories. I glanced back at Hayashi’s face. She still had that gloomy expression.

“Sorry. Really.”

All I could do for Hayashi now was apologize profusely. I offered another apology.

But what exactly was I apologizing for? I was starting to lose track. Hayashi had said earlier that her current dejection wasn’t because of disgust over me dating Kasahara, whom she used to hate back then. If that’s the case, I had no clue why she was so down.

“…Yamamoto.”

“What?”

“…Let’s head home.”

She showed no signs of bouncing back from her low spirits. Still, Hayashi suggested we go home. I didn’t have any way to cheer her up right now, so I figured the least I could do was follow her wishes. I walked behind her.

On the way home, Hayashi didn’t say a word. Maybe because she’d been holding it the whole time, the bag with the book inside felt a little heavier than before.

Even after we got home, Hayashi’s mood didn’t improve.

Even so, she started cooking dinner like usual. As the savory aroma filled the room, I felt uneasy just lounging alone in the living room, so I decided to busy myself with cleaning the balcony. Lately, sudden downpours like Southeast Asian monsoons had blown in, leaving the balcony in a sorry state.

Naturally, while she was cooking, we didn’t talk. The only noise in the room was the chatter of comedians on a talk show coming from the TV in the living room.

Sweating as I worked, I swept up fallen leaves with a dustpan, wiped down the clothes-drying pole, cleaned the windows, and tried to fill this unbearable time.

From the balcony, through the glass, I occasionally glanced at Hayashi.

As expected, she still seemed down. What about my past with Kasahara could’ve upset her so much? But even if something bothered her, would it normally make someone this depressed? Maybe the reason Hayashi’s in such a state… isn’t anger or frustration, but something else entirely.

While I was vaguely watching her, I noticed the pot she was cooking with was boiling over. And Hayashi, lost in her own world, hadn’t noticed.

“Hayashi, the pot!”

“Huh? …Ow!”

I called out in a hurry, but it was too late.

Stirring the pot with chopsticks in a daze, Hayashi flinched as hot water splashed onto her hand. The pot lid she was holding in her left hand clattered to the floor.

“You okay?”

I quickly kicked off my sandals and rushed to Hayashi. I turned off the stove and grabbed her hand. The tip of her right index finger was red—she’d burned herself.

“For now, cool it under water.”

I helped Hayashi up, brought her finger to the sink, and ran cold water over it. She winced for a moment but soon seemed to calm down a bit.

“…Sorry.”

“It’s fine. I’m partly to blame for leaving the cooking to you. My bad.”

“…I’m such a mess.”

“That’s not like you to say. Doesn’t suit you at all.”

“…I’m not exactly strong, you know.”

A brief silence followed. The only sound was the running water echoing around us. I’d once thought Hayashi was surprisingly fragile at heart. But seeing her speak so self-deprecatingly, she looked even more vulnerable than usual.

“…I really hate myself sometimes. This useless version of me… I hate it.”

“You’re saying some unusually weak stuff. Something bad happen?”

I tried to brush it off lightly, but Hayashi didn’t even crack a wry smile. She seemed to be in a seriously bad place.

As I kept her hand under the water, I realized I was still holding her wrist. By now, she could probably keep it under the water herself without my help.

I stepped back from her. While she cooled her hand, I figured I’d get some Vaseline ready.

“Sorry for always being such a burden.”

“Don’t worry about it. No one gets through life alone.”

“…But I’m always causing you trouble.”

“If we’re talking long-term, I’ve caused you plenty of trouble too. So don’t sweat it.”

“…Hey, Yamamoto.”

“Yeah?”

“…Maybe I should just move out of this place.”

I grabbed the Vaseline and slowly turned to face Hayashi.

Thank you for the number one spot in the daily genre rankings.

This is the first time I’ve held the top spot for several days, and your encouragement and support mean the world to me.

I’ll keep pushing to maintain two chapters a day!!! (Today’s the fifth chapter)