Hayashi Megumi’s Jealousy

This is from the heroine’s perspective (sixth time).

It’s likely to continue for a while.

It was just a message, but I was able to talk with Akari for the first time in a while. Honestly, I was feeling a bit nervous inside. The distance between me and Akari started growing around the time I met my previous boyfriend, who was violent toward me. From then until now, for different reasons, our friendship has changed drastically compared to our high school days.

The reason for that distance, both back then with my ex and now, is entirely my fault.

Would Akari blame me for it?

That’s what I was thinking as I sent replies to her messages.

In the end, she was the same as always. The same kind, indulgent friend who’s gentle with those she cares about.

A pang of guilt tightened my chest.

Even though I could excuse what happened with my ex as unavoidable, the reason I’m keeping my distance from Akari now is purely selfish.

Part of me even wished she’d call me out on it.

Tell me to stop chasing after some guy and ignoring our friendship.

I thought maybe if things got messy between us, it’d be for the best.

But despite those thoughts, she reached out to me instead.

Honestly, I’m blessed with such a great friend. That’s what I think.

…And at the same time, I realized something else.

It’s exactly because of Akari’s kindness that Yamamoto developed feelings for her, isn’t it?

“What’re you doing?”

In the living room.

Fresh out of the bath, Yamamoto was drying his hair with a towel, eyeing me suspiciously.

“Nothing.”

“…Huh?”

“I said, it’s nothing.”

“That’s a bit hard to believe.”

…What I was doing just now.

Well, it was…

“Just practicing my smile, okay? Is that a problem?”

Akari’s greatest charm as a person is probably that warm, inclusive smile of hers.

That smile is captivating, provocative, innocent, and refined. It’s a perfect smile that embodies every possible quality.

It’s a reflection of who she is… her ability to connect with people so effortlessly.

If only I could smile like that.

Back in high school, I never even thought about stuff like this.

So when did I start thinking this way? When did I become so jealous?

“Did that smile just now look like Akari’s?”

“Uh… well, kinda, I guess?”

I puffed out my cheeks and shot Yamamoto a protesting glare.

That totally means it didn’t look like hers at all…

Looking into the mirror, I pressed my fingers to my cheeks, trying to lift the corners of my mouth.

I tried to mimic that smile. But no matter how I raised my lips, it always came out looking unnatural.

Still, if it’s the smile that made him fall for her, I can’t help but think if I could pull it off even a little, maybe he’d look at me more?

“That face doesn’t suit you.”

“Is that bad?”

“Nah. It’s just that your usual confident smile fits you better.”

“…Hmph.”

I let go of the fingers lifting my cheeks. I stepped away from the mirror.

…Well, he did say it suits me.

Guess Akari’s smile doesn’t fit me after all.

Not that I was happy about being complimented or anything, okay?

“Hayashi, your face is red.”

…Sorry for lying.

I was super happy…

Letting out a groan, I flopped onto Yamamoto’s futon.

Since that one day when I sniffed Yamamoto’s pillow, I’ve made it a habit to roll around in his futon whenever I get the chance. I’d hug the pillow, pretending it was an accident, marking it with my scent or sniffing it eagerly, never slacking in my efforts.

…Efforts, huh?

“You’ve been ‘mistaking’ my futon for yours a lot lately, huh?”

Notice already, you dense idiot. I’m trying to get your attention.

Of course, being the coward I am, I could never actually say that.

I glared at Yamamoto, who was watching TV without a care, then sat up, satisfied.

…Come to think of it, I remembered there’s something I need to tell Yamamoto.

My cash card stopped working, and I was freaking out, so I could only post two chapters yesterday.

I’m really sorry.

I was mentally drained. It doesn’t seem like it was seized or anything. I mean, the only debt I have is my student loan, and I’ve been paying it back properly. No way, right?

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